Stubborn Calves

 Many people have so much difficulty getting their calf muscles to grow that they conclude that their genetics just make it impossible. Before I continue, let me be clear. Some people's genes do make it easier for them to grow their calves, while others do have to work a little harder.

BUT! Many folks who think their genetics mean they'll be cursed with bean pole calves forever, just don't realize that calf muscles need to be trained differently than most other muscles.  Let me share some suggestions. 

What's So Different About Calves?

Unlike almost all of the rest of your muscles, each calf muscle lifts your entire body weight hundreds or thousands of times a day.  So they're just not going to be impressed with 3 sets of 8 to 10 reps once a week, even with a lot of weight. You're going to need much more volume. Try one or more of the suggestions below. The more you feel your calves are lagging behind, the more of these you should do:

1. For each set, try doing sets of 15 - 20 reps. You'll probably need to use less weight than you're used to, but you'll still be doing more total volume, so swallow your pride.
2. Do 4 or 5 sets. Yes, that takes more precious time, but you can compensate for that if you...
3. Limit your rest to 30 seconds between sets. Yes, it sucks, but it makes the exercise more effective.
4. Exercise them 3 to 5 days per week.  Yes, really! They can take more frequency than just about any other muscle. Remember, you're already working them every day, just by living your life and walking around.

No Machine? No Problem. 

You can do calf raises at home, or on your morning walk, or at the gym (even if the machine is busy). You'll need a stair step, curb, or something similar, as long as there's something next to it you can hold on to for balance, like a handrail or post or something. Since a video's worth a million words, watch this. I'll spare you the torture of watching me do 20 reps.

Here you saw two variations: with both legs at the same time, and working each side separately. Notice that my heels are lower than my toes at the bottom of each rep. Also, you can't see it in the video (sorry), but I'm holding on to one of the uprights for balance.

Be sure to pause for half a second at the top and bottom of each rep. The most common mistake I see people doing on any calf excercise is "bouncing" the weight or their body up and down. You'll move more weight that way, but it's much less effective. And might get you an injury.

Is this kind of calf raise better than seated calf raises with a barbell, or on a machine? It might be, though if you can, I recommend alternating seated and standing calf raises. They do work your calves slightly differently. If not, these will definitely get the job done.

How to Vary the Difficulty 

Here are a bunch of ways to do this exercise,  from easier to harder.

• Do it with both sides at the same time, just like in the video.
• For more weight, hold a dumbbell in your free hand.
• Do only one side at a time with just your body weight.
• One side at a time with a dumbbell.
• To really torture yourself with a nasty pump, but also make the exercise super duper effective, stretch the muscle(s) by holding the bottom-of-the-rep position for up to 30 seconds before the first rep of each set.

Okay! Give 'em a try and show your genes who's boss!

The Friendly Lifter

Sample Weight Training Program

I'm ready to try weight training!

...What do I do?

I hear that from lots of folks, and it's a totally reasonable question. Often, though, you either get mysterious, not-useful-for-beginners answers, or you get so inundated with information that it's downright paralyzing.

Have I Got a Deal For You!

With this post, I'm going to try to give you a solid starting point. And I'm not going to charge you a penny! But...there's still a cost. I'm gonna make you read. And you might have to do a little bit of internet research. First, the disclaimers: 

• I'm not a professional trainer. I'm just a guy with experience who reads a lot. 
• If I list an exercise you're not familiar with, Google it with the word "form" added. For example, "face pulls form".
• If I use a term you don't understand, take a peek in my mini weight training dictionary.
• If you're trying an exercise for the first time, practice the form with a very light weight (an empty bar or very light dumbbells or select the lightest weight on your machine)
• Your first few workouts will be for figuring out how much weight to use. For more details on how to do that, read this post.

I'm going to suggest a 3-day split. That means you will be doing a cycle of three different workouts, each one on a different day. You don't have to always do "Push Day" on a Monday, just make sure that any day you work out, you do the next workout in the cycle. For example:

MONDAY - Push day

TUESDAY - Pull day

WEDNESDAY - rest (no workout)

THURSDAY - Legs day

FRIDAY - rest

SATURDAY - Push day

SUNDAY - rest

NEXT MONDAY - Pull day

NEXT TUESDAY - Legs day

...and so on...

Here's the Program

Each exercise, I will also specify which muscle group is being trained. That's important, because if you want to try a different exercise, you should find one that works the same muscle group. For each exercise, do 3 sets of 8 to 10 reps and rest about a minute between sets. To get more detail on what that means, please check out this post.

DAY 1, "Push Day" for shoulders (delts), chest (pecs), and triceps

• Bench press OR dumbbell chest press (chest)
• Incline butterfy OR cable fly (chest)
• Decline press OR dips OR assisted dips (chest/triceps)
• cable press downs OR close-grip bench press (triceps)
• Military press OR overhead dumbbell press (shoulders)
• Dumbbell OR cable side lateral raise (shoulders)

DAY 2, "Pull Day" for lower back, upper back (lats, rear delts, and traps), and biceps

• deadlift OR sumo deadlift (lower back)
• pull-ups OR assisted pull-ups OR cable pull-downs (upper back - lats)
• cable low row OR chest-supported row (lats and biceps)
• bent-over reverse fly OR band pull-aparts (upper back - rear delts and traps)
• hammer curls OR concentration curls (biceps)
• face pulls OR dumbbell shrugs (upper back - traps)

DAY 3, "Legs Day" for lower body (quads, hamstrings, glutes, and calves) and abs

• barbell back squat OR goblet squat (quads)
• lunges OR reverse lunges OR step-ups (quads)
• leg curl machine OR leg press with feet high and wide (hamstrings)
• Romanian deadlift OR bridges OR hip thrusters (hamstrings and glutes)
• calf raises OR leg press calf extension (calves)
• weighted crunches OR planks (abs)

How Much Weight Should I Lift?

Here's a post all about that. But in a nutshell, select a weight for each exercise that you can do for 8 to 10 reps. Figuring this out might take up your first three workouts, but that’s okay. Then aim for doing 3 sets of 8 to 10 reps of each exercise. If you succeed at doing 3 sets of 10 on a certain exercise, then you're probably ready to increase the weight for that exercise by 5 to 10% next time.

Don't forget, this program will get you started, but it's not perfect. Over time, be willing to make changes! My favorite website for learning new things about weight training is t-nation.com. Unlike me, those folks have actual degrees in this stuff.

Hope this all helps!

The Friendly Lifter

Let's Talk Basics

 

Weight Training 101

You probably already know that people do weight training to get stronger and make their muscles bigger.  (It’s also a great way to lose fat.)  But how we go about accomplishing that isn’t necessarily obvious, so give me one minute to talk basics.

When you look in the weight room at the gym, you see people making objects move back and forth, so it’s reasonable to assume that’s the primary purpose, but it’s actually not.  The most important thing you need to accomplish in the weight room is to make your muscles tired.  Moving objects back and forth is simply the means to that end, but it’s not the actual point.

Does that seem like splitting hairs?  Honestly, it’s not.  When you understand that you are moving heavy things around in order to tire out your muscles, then you start to think about your muscles more than the weight.  You start to analyze which muscles will benefit from moving this object in this particular way.  And most importantly, you begin to understand that this weight lifting business goes a lot deeper than you may have realized before.

The most important principle of weight training is to do an exercise until your muscle is too tired to do it any more.  Every time you do an exercise, make sure you know which muscle it is intended to train, then do the exercise until that muscle is too tired to continue without resorting to bad form.  That's when you stop and rest.

When to Stop and When to Go

Each time you move the weight, that's called a "rep" (short for "repetition").  When you do a certain number of reps then stop to rest, you've done what's called a "set". Each time you do a set, you should have a certain number of reps that you're trying to achieve. That's your "rep goal". But that goal should be a challenge, so you if you're hitting your rep goal all the time, then the goal is too easy. You should also have in mind a "rep range". For example, if your rep goal is 10 reps, you would probably set your rep range at 8 to 10 reps, meaning that getting to 8 or 9 reps is good, but you should keep trying to get all the way to 10 next time.

Your workout will be more effective if you do 2 or 3 sets of each exercise. So after your first set, rest for about a minute then do another set.  You might do another exercise for that same muscle, depending on what kind of program you're doing. But hopefully at that point, you've made your muscle good and tired.  That's how you signal to your body that it needs to improve your strength and grow the muscle.

Where Are My Gainz?

So you've finished a great workout. Your muscles are bigger and stronger now, right? Wellll, yes and no. When a muscle works hard, it demands plenty of oxygen to help fuel that effort. Your body responds by pumping extra blood to that muscle. You might notice the muscle feels extra full, or extra warm, or maybe even a tiny bit bigger. That's called a "pump", and it really does temporarily make your muscle bigger and fuller. But the pump fades about 15 minutes after your workout. Sorry.

Your muscles don't actually do their growing and strengthening at the gym. They do most of that while you're sleeping. Working out sends signals to your body that those muscles need to grow and repair and get stronger. Since sleep is when your body does most of its healing, that's also when your "gainz" happen. So it's really important to make sure you're getting plenty of sleep as part of your workout program.

Have a great workout, and don't forget, it's okay to ask questions!

The Friendly Lifter

How Much Weight?

 Why Won’t Anyone Tell Me How Much Weight to Lift?

Any good lifting program you find on the internet or in a book will likely list exercises, sets, reps, rest periods, and days per week, but will say nothing about how much weight to use.  That’s because it’s your job to figure out the weight.  And it’s not that hard, but it’s going to take some trial and error.  Plan on your first week of a new exercise or program to be mostly about figuring your weights out.  After that, you can put the pedal to the metal.

Here’s How

Get ready to do your first exercise.  If you’ve never done it before, practice the form with the lightest weight possible.  Once you’ve got the form down, choose a weight that seems reasonable to you.  DON’T LOOK AT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE LIFTING, just be conservative.  

Let’s say you’re going to be lifting the weight for 10 reps--that’s a good number, if you’re not sure.  If you can lift that weight 10 times like it’s nothing: rest, add 10 to 20% to the weight, and try 10 more reps.  If you lifted it pretty well for 10 times, but it wasn’t a total cakewalk: rest, add 5 to 10% to the weight, and try 10 more reps.  If you got to 10 reps just barely, or could only do 8 or 9 reps, the weight you’ve got is probably a good one to use for future workouts.  Write that number down!  If you only made it to 4 or 5 reps: rest, decrease the weight by 10 to 20% or more, and try again.

Keep in mind that form matters here.  Lots of exercises can be done with much more weight if you do them with terrible form.  Don’t go there.

Keep repeating this process until you find your working weight for that exercise.  Then repeat the process for other exercises.  This process might require your entire workout time; if so, that’s fine, you are working your muscles, after all.  If you’ve got plenty of time left over, try a set or two more of each exercise before you go home.

What's a 1RM?

You may hear or read stuff that includes the phrase “1-rep max” or just the abbreviation “1RM”.  Often, it will be something like “Use 80% of your 1RM for this exercise”.  Your 1-rep max is how much you can lift exactly once; the absolute maximum amount your body can move.  I strongly recommend you don’t actually test your 1-rep max on any exercise without a trainer’s assistance, because when you’re approaching the maximum amount of weight your body can handle, accidents and injuries can happen.

Instead, test your 3-rep, 5-rep, or 8-rep max and use a 1RM calculator (they’re all over the internet) to estimate your 1RM.  Different calculators will give slightly different results, but they’ll pretty much all be close enough.  This is the one I use: 1RM Calculator

Sorry I Couldn't Just Tell You the Answers!

When you start lifting, or start a new program, plan on your first workout(s) to be mostly experimenting to find the right weights. It might seem kind of loosy-goosy or inconvenient, but you might also start to enjoy this process. Certainly, there's no pressure to set any world records here!

Go get started!

The Friendly Lifter

Better Than Sit-Ups

Sit-ups suck. Sorry, they just do. I mean, I love to exercise, and even I hate them! Fortunately, I have another option for strengthening your abs, and you can do them at home, so no excuses!

Weighted Crunches

You're going to need a book or pillow or some other object. It's better for now if the object isn't very heavy, but we're going to call it a "weight" anyway. 

Lie flat on your back on the floor. Bend your knees and plant your feet flat on the floor. Hold the weight in both hands. Extend your arms so you're holding the weight nice and high above your chest. Now you're ready to get started.

Pretend you're shoving that weight straight up into the ceiling. As you do, your head and shoulders should come up off the floor. Now relax back down so you're in your starting position again. You've just done one repetition, or "rep". Notice that you're not trying to bring your chin closer to your knees like a sit-up, and you're not curling your upper body like a traditional crunch. In the video you can see the weight travels in a slightly curved path, but focus just on moving it up and down.

I want you to do as many reps in a row as you can. Try for 10 or 12 or 15. It's okay if you can't do 15, that's just a goal. (Did you do a zillion? Good for you! Stay tuned, I have a bigger challenge for you later on.) Once you can't do any more reps, relax for a bit. Set your weight down or hold it on top of your chest, whatever's comfortable. Catch your breath for about 60 seconds. You just did what's called a "set" of reps.

Do three sets, resting about a minute after each one. That's it. Now go for a walk or lift some weights or dance with your kids.

Why Are These Better?

Well, I'm not a personal trainer, I'm just a crazy guy who likes to do this stuff. But I've read a bit about weighted crunches and several different sources recommend them over sit-ups because they're easier on the spine and lower back muscles. And some have said they're better than traditional crunches because it's easier to get the form right and not accidentally screw up your back. I just know my body is much happier after I've done three sets of these.

I'm Ready for Something Harder. What Now?

There are several ways to add to the challenge. Pick any ONE of these each time you're ready for more:

1. Do more reps per set. For example, 3 sets of 20 repetitions.
2. Do more sets. Think you could do 5 sets of 15 reps? Go for it!
3. Hold a heavier weight. Try a sack of rice or a pair of dumbbells or your kid. Fun, right?
4. Exhale as forcefully as you can each time you do a rep. Imagine you're blowing that weight right up to the ceiling. If you watched the video, this is why I sound like a spouting whale. You'd be surprised how hard the exercise gets when you do this!
5. On each rep, hold your body in the "up" position briefly before lowering yourself back down. The longer you pause up there, the bigger the challenge.

Start out easy, but keep challenging yourself a little more each week. Don't try these some day, try them now!

Really, now!

-The Friendly Lifter

Bigger Arms!

If you lift weights to make your muscles grow, then you probably want nice, big arm muscles.  After all, when someone wants to show off their muscles, what do they do?  Flex their arms!  I see a lot of questions on the internet from folks who struggle to get their arms to grow, so I’d like to take this moment to share some of the advice I’ve picked up over the years.

Work Them More Often

The classic advice for lifters used to be to work each muscle group only once per week.  But quite a lot of recent research has shown that working a muscle group more often is the best possible way to get it to grow more, as long as you give it a day of rest before you work it again.  Try programming 28 to 32 sets PER WEEK for each muscle group that needs some extra stimulation, and spread those sets across two or three workouts.  Just remember to give each muscle group a day off before you work it again.

"Tri"-ing to Grow

Your upper arm is home to the triceps muscle--the one at the back of your arm that runs from your armpit to your elbow bone--and the biceps muscle--the one opposite your triceps that is probably the most famous bodybuilder muscle.  You absolutely want to grow your biceps muscle, but don't neglect the triceps!  It accounts for two-thirds of your arm's total volume, so if you want big arms, make sure you give both muscles a good workout.  I've even heard advice that you should do twice as many reps for your triceps as you do for your biceps each week.  I'm not sure you have to go that far, but if your triceps need some extra help, give them a few extra sets per week.

Don't Lift With Your Ego

Make sure you're using excellent form, especially on barbell bicep curls.  The most common example of "ego" lifting I've been seeing at my gym lately is guys (mostly guys) who pick a weight that's too heavy for them, then they use their whole body to kind of "throw" the weight upward.  If your legs are bending and straightening a lot or your upper body is tilting back and forth as you do your reps, that's a sign that you're not really stimulating your arm muscles the way you need to.  Instead, try to keep the rest of your body still.

When you do bicep curls, start each rep by straightening your arm and flexing your triceps--this will help ensure there's no momentum assisting you as you lift.  During the rep, only your forearms should move through 90% of the rep, then at the very top of the rep you can raise the angle of your upper arms slightly.  That's because your biceps are responsible for bending the elbow and, to a lesser extent, raising the angle of your upper arm.  If you do everything correctly, you may discover you need to use a lighter bar.

Finally, control the weight as it goes back down to its starting position.  If you are letting it flop down, that's also a sign that you're holding too much weight.

Feel That Pump

If you've ever heard lifters talk about "the pump" and didn't know what they meant, it's time to fill you in.  When you exercise a muscle, it needs extra fuel to do its job.  Your body feeds extra blood to the muscle, which literally causes it to "inflate" a little bit.  Ever seen some big, muscley guy flexing in front of the mirror at the end of his workout?  That's why--his muscles are actually bigger than when he started his workout!  Sadly, the pump won't last forever.  5 to 15 minutes after you finish using a muscle, the blood starts to flow back to the rest of your body and the pump fades.

Your muscles have these connective tissues called fascia surrounding them, and the fascia can physically limit how much your muscles can grow.  By getting a nice, big pump in your muscles, those fascia weaken their grip on your muscles, which makes it possible for your muscles to grow.  So although getting a big pump is lots of fun for flexing in the mirror, it's also important for long-term muscle growth.

When you do your arm exercises, try to feel that pump as much as possible.  At the top of each rep, pause for a second or two and squeeze the muscle as hard as you can.  Don't forget that the "top" of a rep may feel like the bottom, if the direction of movement is downward like with triceps pushdowns.  If you're having trouble getting a good pump, try doing at least one exercise with lots of reps (15 to 20 per set).

Feel That S-T-R-E-T-C-H

Stretching your muscles under tension can also help break down the fascia and get that pump going.  At the bottom of the rep, before you start lifting your next rep, try to feel a good stretch.  This stimulates your muscles for growth as well.  Some exercises lend themselves to this better than others.  For biceps, I like preacher curls with or without an e-z curl bar, and vertical preacher curls (where you face the "wrong" way on the bench) with dumbbells.  For triceps, I get a good stretch from overhead dumbbell triceps extensions and overhead cable rope "pushdowns".

Slow and Steady Wins the Arms Race

As you lower the weight in the "eccentric" or "negative" phase of each rep, do it s-l-o-w-l-y.  Like, count 5 to 10 seconds as you lower the weight.  You could do that on every arm exercise, but if you get too exhausted, choose one or a few exercises to use this technique on.

My Apologies to Your Arms

Your arms are gonna be tired!  But that's the way you make them grow!

Best wishes,
The Friendly Lifter

Protein Powder

Should I Use Protein Powder?  What Is It For, Anyway?

Protein powder is a convenient way to consume large amounts of protein.  Most lean proteins (i.e., meat and eggs) have to be refrigerated, and that can make them inconvenient or impossible, especially in certain workplaces.  Protein powder is shelf-stable, meaning you don’t need to refrigerate it (you should probably keep prepared shakes refrigerated if you don’t plan to drink them within a couple of hours).  Sipping a protein shake can also be a great way to get those grams down your throat, without feeling like you’re choking on your 27th chicken breast of the day.

I have been chewed out by “real food” maniacs about how protein powder is the root of all evil.  I know it’s probably somewhat more beneficial to get your protein from eggs that you cracked yourself and meat that you hunted and killed with your bare hands.  Yes, obviously, protein powder is processed. But so are almond milk, canned soup, and ice cream. If you’re going to crusade against protein powder, then you should be just as angry about graham crackers and deli meat.  They’re all processed. I respect people’s right to advocate for more natural foods. But let’s also allow people to make their own decisions, thank you very much.

Is Protein Powder a Food, Or a Supplement?

We can argue all day about technicalities and word definitions, but as far as your digestive system is concerned, protein shakes are food.  That means you need to count those grams in your food diary. Drinking a shake and eating a moderate handful of nuts could be a really good snack in the afternoon, or a quick way to get your first meal in when it’s too early to be thinking about cooking.

Be sure to check out the nutrition facts on the powder you’re buying.  Some powders have significantly more carbs than others, and some even add sugar.  I suggest you look for a protein powder (not a “mass gainer”) that has as few carbs and fat as possible per serving.  My favorite is CytoSport’s 100% Whey; Optimum Nutrition makes a good product also called 100% Whey.

If you’re looking for a bargain, Costco has the best prices.  I swear, my protein powder savings alone more than pay for my annual membership fee.

How Much Should I Use?

Figure out how much protein you still need to cram into your diet today; that’s how much you should use.  For example, if you see that you’re probably going to miss your protein goal by 30 grams, and your powder has 24 grams per scoop, make a shake with a scoop plus a little extra.

So...use protein powder/protein shakes for convenience, or when you need to balance your macronutrients and don’t have enough protein.

Hope that helps!

The Friendly Lifter

Rest and Recovery Are Essential

Getting fit is a long process, and we all get frustrated from time to time; even the really experienced folks do.  At some point, you might find yourself just wanting to quit.  If you're feeling constantly exhausted, yawning through the day, dreading your workout, or even getting depressed, please don't give up!  Rest and recharge instead.

Working Out Properly Causes Wear and Tear

Working out is healthy, but can also wear your body down.  The process of lifting weights is especially hard on the body.  Whenever you lift hard enough to really challenge yourself, your muscles sustain microscopic cellular damage called "microtears".  They're so tiny they're not considered injuries and you won't even be aware of them, but they're still important.  Your body heals those microtears, and in the process strengthens the muscle and makes it grow.  Without the damage, your body wouldn't have any reason to build itself up, so those microscopic tears are necessary.

But healing and building new muscle also takes energy, and if you're challenging yourself, then at some point you'll probably pick up one or two minor injuries in your muscles, joints, or connective tissues.  A little soreness in the shoulder, a little tenderness in the knee, whatever.  Even cardio-based workout programs will cause wear and tear that needs to heal, but with lifting, rest is especially important to consider.  That's why experts recommend that you plan on taking time off from working out periodically.  For weight trainers, many experts suggest you take an entire week off for every six to twelve weeks of training.

De-Loading

You could literally take the week off, staying away from the weights entirely.  Lots of folks do that.  Or, if staying away from the gym entirely would drive you as crazy as it would me, you could do what's called a "de-load" week.  That means doing very light workouts, usually with fewer sets, lighter weights, and more reps per set.  You could add in some light cardio.  

This period of recovery is so important, some workout programs even include a plan for time off every "X" weeks.  Other people prefer to decide when to take time off based on how their body feels.  Sometimes, life kinda steps in and forces you to take time off because you're traveling or you get the flu or everything at work explodes.

...But I'll Lose All My Gainz!

Don't worry.  Science tells us that, if you're eating a healthy diet, you won't start losing strength or muscle mass in only 7 days.  Some studies have found people can go two weeks or more without noticing any drop in performance when they come back to the weights.  In fact, it's very, very common for lifters to report that when they return to working out after a week off, their performance enjoys a significant boost.  Their strength and size gains are much better after having taken some time off.  Seriously, time off won't hurt your gainz, it'll help them in the long run!

After Your Time Off

So you took a week off or de-loaded for a week, and now you're gearing up to get back to lifting.  How you feel at that moment is kind of a fascinating study in human psychology.  Some folks get back to the gym feeling a massive energy boost, like a team of wild horses couldn't hold them back.  Others worry that they've forgotten everything they ever learned about working out, and are nervous as a result.  Whatever you're feeling as you walk out onto the gym floor, you should know you're not alone.  Just get out there and lift.  Do your reps and don't over-think that week off that you took.  You're gonna do great work, so just do it.

Take care of yourself!  Rest, recover, and get back to work!
The Friendly Lifter

Supplements

There is a lot of misinformation swirling around the topic of supplements, particularly those intended to boost your workout performance.  Here are my honest impressions.

"But I Don’t Believe in Steroids!"

I am going to type this as slowly and as loudly as I can: SUPPLEMENTS ARE NOT STEROIDS!!!  Steroids are illegal in the U.S., plus a bunch of other countries.  If you can find it on a shelf in a store at the mall and plunk it down at the cash register and walk out with it in a bag, it is not steroids.  Period.

What Supplements Should I Take?  Are Supplements Even Worth It?

I am going to give you my personal opinions here--I’m not a personal trainer or professional nutritionist--but I think they’re pretty sound.  Here are the supplements I think will help you do better in the gym:

• a multivitamin - Take your pick.
• vitamins and minerals - Vitamins C and D, magnesium, calcium, potassium, and zinc are all helpful in recovering from workouts or strengthening muscle and bone.  If you’re not getting enough from food, take a supplement.  Note that your multivitamin may not contain some of these, so read the label.
• caffeine - There is a decent amount of evidence that suggests caffeine does help you perform better in the gym.  You could take an expensive pre-workout supplement; nearly all of the ones on the market have hefty doses of caffeine and in my opinion, that’s about all they have that’s going to do you any good.  So my advice is, just drink some coffee.
• creatine monohydrate - Unlike most supplements you will find at the supplement store, creatine’s benefits have been well-documented for decades.  It helps your muscles recover more quickly from high-intensity activities like lifting a heavy weight.  This means that you may find your second and third sets of an exercise go just a bit better with the help of creatine.  It also helps develop muscle size and strength over time.  You don’t need a super fancy form of creatine, so shop around for a powder that is cheap.
• BCAA’s - Short for “branch-chained amino acids”, which are the building blocks of proteins, and from there, of muscles.  I don’t currently take these, but I have.  I changed my mind because I realized I was already getting complete proteins from my protein powder, and there’s a decent amount of disagreement among experts about whether BCAA’s are actually needed for folks who get plenty of protein intake.

That’s it.  Based on my research, almost all of those shelves and shelves of bottles you see in the supplement store are either snake oil, or are marginally helpful but not worth the expense and side effects.  And you shouldn’t feel like caffeine, creatine, or BCAA’s are going to make or break your workouts.  If you don’t want to use them, don’t.

Are Supplements Safe?

If you live in the U.S. you need to know that supplements, from the chewable vitamin C tablet you gave your toddler this morning to the “testosterone booster” in the dodgy-looking packaging, are not regulated.  There’s no government agency checking to see if those supplements are what they claim to be.  Let the buyer beware.  I go ahead and take the supplements I mentioned above, but if all this makes you nervous, skip them.  If you’re eating a healthy diet, none of them is essential.

Did I Hurt Your Feelings? 

I wasn't trying to.  If I didn't mention your favorite supplement, I'm not saying it's definitely worthless, only that I haven't found any evidence to support its value.  Keep taking it if you want to.

Remember, supplements are there to help your workout, but you've still got to work out!

Best wishes,

The Friendly Lifter

Momentum vs. Motivation

"I Just Need Some Motivation…"

Whenever and wherever fitness is being discussed, the word “motivation” comes up endlessly.  And I totally get it.  In evolutionary terms, we still haven’t developed beyond the psychology of the hunter-gatherer, and our bodies and minds still kinda see the world in those terms.  “Exercise”?  Just, do strenuous things that don’t result in food or self defense or sex?  Waste of energy.  Forget it.  We are programmed to conserve that energy, just in case.

BUT!  The human body is uniquely designed to be challenged and put to work, so evolution is not entirely working against you.

This tension between conserving energy and storing fat on one side, versus putting your body to work and being healthy on the other side, is where a lot of “motivation” talk comes from.  People know intellectually that they should be healthy and that they want to look awesome, but there’s still that pull toward laziness that we all feel.  Most folks would say that motivation is there to bridge the gap between lazy and healthy.

Go online and search for exercise motivation, and you will be drowning in it.  You will read frightening statistics about what will happen to you if you miss your workout.  You will chuckle over attitude-filled one-liners.  You will be treated to uplifting quotes about determination and grit.  You will shed a tear over someone’s life journey.  You will see inspiring photos of skinny or muscular people covered in sweat.  Eagles will soar.  Ships will majestically sail.  Men will land on the moon again and again.

And sometimes, that stuff helps.  But all too often, that kind of motivation is usually good enough to get us back into our workout shoes only once.  The effect wears off quickly when confronted with that voice inside us that says, “But I don’t wanna!”

The Hole

I have a name for the feeling of resistance to working out.  I call it “The Hole”.  You have to climb out of that Hole before you can get to work.  If you don’t climb out, you stay on the couch feeling simultaneously relieved and filled with shame.  The Hole will be deeper or shallower, depending on a million variables from your mental and physical state to the weather to how much effort it takes to find a matching pair of socks.  But getting out of The Hole takes effort.

Sure, motivation can be that extra little bit that gets you out of your Hole and gets you moving.  But there’s something else that is more important for keeping you on your path to fitness: momentum.

Building Momentum

Getting out of your Hole does get easier over time.  (If you’re shaking your head and laughing bitterly right now, it’s possible you’re forcing yourself to do a form of exercise that’s just not suited to you.  In that case, I’d like to invite you to stop here and read another of my posts, called "The Exercise Dating Game".)

Building momentum tends to happen in stages:
The Not-So-Bad Stage – If you work out regularly enough, you start to have more positive than negative thoughts about exercising.  It’s even better if you can focus really fiercely on those positive experiences.  Climbing out of your Hole is more like stepping out of a bucket.
The Automatic Stage – Over time, working out is just part of your week.  You tend to hop right over your Hole without even entering it.
The Don’t-Get-In-My-Way Stage – You can’t imagine your life without exercise as part of it, and it really ticks you off when something interferes with your workout.  Hole?  What Hole?

We all have setbacks, sometimes big ones.  Injuries, illness, life events both good and bad.  If you need to, put up a motivational poster in your Hole for the occasions when you fall into it.  And if you miss a few sessions, forgive yourself and get back on the horse.  Don’t leave room in your hole for self-loathing.  Do leave room in your hole for a ladder.

Consistency is the key here.  Set yourself a schedule and do your very best to keep to it.  Get up early and get to the gym before work.  Go for that walk during your lunch break.  Keep that time in the evening sacred for when you go biking.  Enlist a friend if it helps.

Try not to think about IF you are going to exercise, just WHEN.

Some Kinds of Motivation Are More Effective

I don’t mean to tell you that all motivation sucks, just that some kinds aren’t as effective as momentum is at keeping you on your exercise program.  Everyone is different, but certain things are pretty effective for many people.  Maybe one of these will keep your head in the game when you start to lose that momentum:

• Reminding yourself that you want to be healthy for your spouse/child/parent/etc.
• Buying a great outfit that’s just a bit too small, and trying it on from time to time
• Remembering that your grandparent/parent/sibling had heart disease/fatty liver/diabetes/etc. and you want to avoid ending up with the same health problem
• Proving to your critics, real or imagined, that you’re better than they said you are...those jerks
• Pretending you’re someone, real or fictional, who you really look up to, and nothing can stop you (seriously, this worked for me)

I PROMISE this exercise business gets easier, the more you keep at it.  You’re going to get there.  Just keep going!
The Friendly Lifter

Finding Fitness Truth

Good advice can be hard to find.  Here are some ways to find the wisdom needle in the information haystack.

Avoiding the Extremes

Sometimes, you will get two pieces of advice that seem to conflict, but that are actually both pointing you to a middle ground.  “Too many cooks spoil the broth” seems to be the exact opposite of “Many hands make light the work.”  But actually, both are true.  It’s just that there’s a sweet spot between doing a job all by yourself and having a hundred people barging in.

For a fitness example?  I hear people swear that the sauna has many health benefits, but others caution it can make you dehydrated.  Well, they’re both right.  (Except the folks who say the heat of the sauna will make you lose fat.  That's wrong.)  If you want to use the sauna, there’s some good evidence that it has health benefits—just make sure you’re getting enough water, because you’re going to sweat in there and you need to replace those fluids.

Here’s another one.  Creatine is just about the only fitness supplement that has been scientifically proven to be helpful with your workouts.  But!!!  There was that 16-year-old in [pick a state] who collapsed during a [pick a sport] game because he had taken too much creatine.  Well, yeah, 16-year-olds are not renowned for their good judgement.  Assuming the story is true, the kid probably took some obscenely large mega dose and not enough water and yeah, that wouldn’t have been good for him.  But if you take the recommended dose and make sure you’re well-hydrated—that is important—then creatine can help you recover more quickly from high-effort activities like sprinting and weight training, and can help with the development of lean muscle tissue.

Are you seeing a pattern?  Moderation.  Two people pointing in opposite directions might be pointing to the same place.  Go to that place.

Sure It’s True, But for Whom?

Fitness folks tend to assume that the whole world has the same goals, experience, and body type as they do.  And unfortunately, many will make broad, sweeping statements based on what has worked for them without really checking—or caring—whether their statement applies to the person they’re hollering at.  And when another of these zealots with differing goals, experience, and body type starts to holler back, things can get ugly…and bewildering for the poor, inexperienced bystander who just wanted to know where the drinking fountain is.  Here are some classics you’re bound to hear at one point or another:

• Always work out fasted.  (This may be true for people doing cardio to burn fat)
• Never go to the gym on an empty stomach.  (Definitely good advice if you’re planning to lift weights)
• You must do the Big 3 Lifts: bench press, squats, and deadlifts.  (If your goal is to get very strong or compete as a powerlifter, definitely yes.)
• There are plenty of great alternatives to the Big 3 Lifts.  (True, especially if you’re more into building muscle size or lifting for overall health rather than getting massively strong.)
• Deadlifts will kill your back.  (If you use bad form or too much weight, they will.  But they’re also a terrible idea for people with unresolved back injuries.  Or other injuries, for that matter.)
• Deadlifts will save your back.  (Maybe.  They sure helped mine.  But again, deadlifts are for strengthening a weak body, not for healing a broken one.)
• I did XYZ and look at me!  So you should do XYZ too!  (Good for them.  And XYZ might work for you, but maybe not.  Do some research.)
• Just work through the pain.  (If your muscles are slightly sore from a workout you did a few days ago, you’ll probably be okay.  If your pain feels like an injury, it’s terrible advice to work through it without the advice of a doctor or trained physical therapist.*)
• * By the way, I’ve been known to work through the pain even when I shouldn’t have.  It was stupid.  Full disclosure.

Most importantly, beware of claims that this or that is best for you, if the person speaking doesn’t know much about you, your body, your goals, and your previous experience.  I’ve even heard tales of personal trainers who launched their client into a workout program without asking about previous injuries or even asking serious questions about the client’s prior experience.  When someone does that to you, thank them for the advice (you’ll never get anywhere by arguing with them) and walk away.

How to Get Better Advice

If you ask people online or in person for diet or workout advice, any suggestions you get will be completely worthless if you haven’t given them any context.  Are you trying to burn fat?  Build muscle? Develop stamina?  Get stronger?  Improve your performance in cycling?  Or swimming? Or pogo stick?  Are you a rank beginner, seasoned veteran, or somewhere in between?  Any injuries in your past that might be relevant?  Diabetes?  Food allergies?  Are you going to a gym or working out at home, where you might not have access to a wide array of equipment?

If you go to a bunch of people and just ask, “How can I get fit?”, you’ll get advice.  Oh boy, will you get it.  But most of it likely won’t be useful or applicable to you.  Here are some examples of better ways to ask:

“I really enjoy using my stationary bike.  I’m looking to burn fat, and I’ve been doing 30-minute sessions and even though I’m getting faster, I’m not losing fat like I used to.  What can I do to re-energize my fat loss?”

“I’m 39 years old and I’d like to build some muscle, but I’ve never lifted weights before, and have no idea what I’m doing.  How should I approach my first few workouts?  And where can I find a good eating plan to help me build that muscle without putting on much fat?”

“I’ve been lifting for a couple years now, and I’m doing well on everything except the squat.  Every time I try to squat, my ankles and knees hurt a lot.  Are there certain form mistakes that commonly cause that?”

Sometimes It’s Okay to Ignore Advice

Give careful consideration to advice you get from people who seem knowledgeable and sane.  Much of what you hear will be solid wisdom for most people, most of the time.  But it’s your body and your diet and your workout, and even advice that was excellent for someone else may not be the best choice for you.  In the end, you need to do something that doesn’t hurt you, that you enjoy, and that helps you make the progress you’re looking for.  Don’t let people paralyze you or bully you into doing something that seems like a bad idea or a waste of time.  Listen to the advice, do a bit of research, make your own decision, and move forward.

I’ll tell you a secret.  That’s the best any of us can do.

Stay sane out there!
The Friendly Lifter

Quick Take: Beware of Bro Science

If you spend much time in the men’s locker room of a gym, you’re eventually going to hear someone spouting nonsense. (Ladies, you’ll have to take my word for this, but somehow I don’t think you’ll be shocked.)  A lot of the nonsense you hear is based on “bro science”: reasoning that seems to make sense but is not backed up by actual facts. 

One example of this is guys claiming the surest way to gain more muscle is to change your workout program every single week.  The logic here is that your muscles adapt to the same stimulus over time, and thus that stimulus (exercise) becomes less effective over time.  This is true.  Therefore, you must change up your exercise routine every time you work out.  This is the bogus part.  In reality, your body develops best with a certain amount of consistency as well as variety.  Most expert advice I’ve read recommends that you keep the same routines for at least 6 weeks--often more like 12 weeks--before evaluating whether a change is needed.  And if you’re making satisfactory progress, most experts recommend you keep doing what’s working, or only make minor changes.

Other examples of bogus fitness ideas:

• You can target specific areas of the body—i.e., the belly—for fat loss.  Sorry, you can't.  Current science says it’s kinda sorta barely possible in certain rare and extremely difficult circumstances, but really just forget it.
• Starving yourself is a good idea.  NO.  Severely restricting your calorie intake can actually backfire when your body throws itself into starvation mode and turns your metabolism way, way down.  There are options that can work, like keto diets or intermittent fasting, but do your research.
• ANYTHING that promises dramatic results in a few weeks.  No, no, no.  Sorry.  No.
• No pain, no gain.  OMG, just because it rhymes doesn’t make it true.  Look, if I put you on a torture rack for 45 minutes, you’d come out sore.  But you wouldn’t gain muscle or lose fat.  A good workout might make you sore, but lack of soreness doesn’t necessarily indicate a failed workout.
• Go big or go home.  I hear this motto spouted more frequently by guys who desperately want to sound badass than by lifters who actually are.  There is good evidence to support heavy lifting to help you build strength and muscle size, but that doesn’t mean you need to make veins explode at every workout.
• It’s impossible to lose fat while gaining muscle.  Actually, I’ve done it.  But mostly this works for beginners.  If you’re a seasoned bodybuilder trying to go from 8% bodyfat to 5%, then probably not.
• You’re going to have to suffer if you want to lose fat.   Actually, I’m rarely hungry when I’m losing fat, but I have to plan my meals intelligently.
• The sauna, or some other heat source, or—heaven preserve us—Sauna Suits will melt your fat away.  You will lose weight: all the water you sweat out.  But no, they won’t make you lose fat, even if you risk a trip to the ER by exercising while severely dehydrated.  Sorry.
• Cardio will destroy your muscle gains.  Really?  I wonder how college and pro football players get so fast and stay so buff.  There are better and worse ways to mix cardio with weight training, but they can be compatible.
• I could go on.  Unfortunately, this is a hole with no bottom.

So if you hear someone recommend something that conflicts with other advice, consider the two sources.  If one has more training and experience than the other, you should go with them.  If both seem equally trustworthy (or suspicious), do some research from more expert sources before you listen to one over the other.

Stay safe and sane out there!
The Friendly Lifter

Don't Leave Your Brains in the Locker

Something that shocks people all the time is just how much thinking is required to make progress in the gym.  Sure you need muscles to move those weights around, but if you don't bring your brain along, you're mostly wasting time.  Here are some ways you can engage your brain muscle to help strengthen your other muscles.

Have a Plan.  

When you arrive at the gym for a workout, you should already know what you’re going to do.  You could be really obsessive like me, and write down every exercise, set, and rep you plan to do for the week on Sunday night.  Or you could have a looser plan, like “I’ll start with bench press, do some cable flyes, triceps extensions, and dips, then I’ll see if I’m up to any more than that.”  But you should have a plan of some kind.  The more specific, the better.

There are a tiny number of people in the world who can do all of this by instinct.  But a large proportion of people who think they can go by instinct, actually can’t. 

Do Good-Quality Reps 98% of the Time.

Every day I see folks who could improve their form to get better results.  But unless someone specifically asks me, I mind my own business.  In many gyms that’s just the unwritten rule.  If you feel like you are working hard but just spinning your wheels, force yourself to take a good, hard look at your form on every single exercise.  Watch some videos online.  And use your brain to visualize each step of the movement before you begin.

Maybe ask someone who seems knowledgeable and sane for form advice on a particular exercise.  Using bad form can put you at risk of injury, but even if that weren’t an issue, bad form would also be a concern because it tends to rob you of the progress you should be making.

The number one example of this that I’ve seen lately at my gym is guys (it’s always guys) using too much weight on the bicep curl.  They’ll grab a bar that’s 20 to 40 pounds too heavy, then on each rep, do this peculiar throwing motion with their whole body to get the bar to go up.  Sure, they are moving a lot of weight, but they’re not going to impress any experienced lifters.  And their biceps are getting very little stimulation, meaning they’re wasting their valuable gym time doing something that’s not going to help them progress.

A better way would be to go lighter on the weight and hold it while standing tall with their elbows close to their sides.  They should move the bar by only bending their elbows; every other part of the body should pretty much remain still, except at the top of the rep, when it’s okay to bring the upper arms slightly upward.  The biceps are responsible for bending the elbow, and to a lesser extent for raising the angle of the upper arm.  Actively moving the torso forward or backward, or bending the legs during the rep, are signs that you’re likely using bad form.

There is a legitimate function for “cheat” reps, where you break form at the end of a set to get that last little bit of effort out.  But the vast majority of people cheat more than they should.

Build Your Mind-Muscle Connection.

The greater your ability to intensely contract and relax a muscle, the better your “mind-muscle connection” is with that muscle.  Try this next time you’re on the leg extension machine.  At the top of the rep, when you have extended your ankles all the way up, squeeze the muscles on top of your thighs as hard as you can.  You may even see them bulge.  You’re using your mind-muscle connection with your quad muscles.

It’s this connection that lets muscle guys make their pecs dance.  It’s also this connection that helps your muscles get more out of your exercises.  When you do biceps curls, squeeze your muscle really hard when the weight is at the “top” of the rep (after you’ve lifted it all the way up).  Try it with triceps cable pushdowns (the “top” of the rep will seem like the bottom because of the direction of movement) and various weight machines.

Get Good, Credible Information from Sources Other Than This One.

Read, read, read.  Just make sure you are reading good-quality material and not crap.  I strongly recommend the articles on these websites:

www.t-nation.com My favorite.  The look of this site is a bit hard-core, but the information is top-quality, and they have a really good mix of articles aimed at all different experience levels.  Their writers aren’t afraid to give you a little tough love, and sometimes that’s exactly what we all need.

www.bodybuilding.com A great site, even for people who don’t think of themselves as bodybuilders.  Straightforward and professional writing about weight training, nutrition, cardio, and lots of other stuff.

www.livestrong.com A site that has a more approachable feel, especially for beginners.  Still lots of excellent advice and information.

www.muscleandstrength.com Also a bit more hard-core in appearance, this site is still a gold mine of good information for all experience levels.

These sites all do a good job of taking beginners seriously, and of treating women as athletes and not eye candy.  There are many other sites out there that also do a good job; I’ve just listed my personal favorites.

I suggest you avoid forums, message boards, and comment sections, even the ones featured on the websites above.  Or at least take them with a huge grain of salt.  Professional writers need to make sure the information they present is of good quality, or their reputations will take a hit.  Some random guy answering some other random guy’s question may provide excellent advice, or may be touting some truly terrible ideas.  Also, keep in mind these sites have to pay the bills, and that means ads, including ads for bogus products and services.


Don't stop progressing!  Learn stuff, then lift stuff, then write stuff down!
The Friendly Lifter

Mind Games 4: Taking the Reins

There's a movement out there encouraging people to have a more positive body image, no matter what kind of shape they're in.  It's sort of push-back against the long-standing tradition of fat-shaming that has become almost a national pastime.  I totally sympathize with folks who are sick to death of the world assuming they're lazy, stupid, or ugly just because they're not as fit as the models on that Ab Roller commercial.  But I'd also like to remind everyone that being overweight does have health issues that go with it.  Please don't try to get fit just to appease the @$$-holes.  But please do keep trying to get fit for your health and happiness.

Re-imagine Yourself

For the first forty years of my life, I saw myself as a Fat Person who was therefore clumsy and ugly and hopelessly unathletic.  It is astonishing to me how much Being Fat was pretty much my whole identity.  One of the biggest struggles I’ve faced was seeing myself as a Person Who Needs to Lose Some Fat, as opposed to a Fat Person.  It may seem like a pointless distinction to someone who’s never been fat, but the rest of us understand there's a colossal difference there.

You might think it’s impossible to reconfigure how you look at yourself, but it can be done.  I did a number of things to convince myself that Being Fat was not my eternal destiny:

• I taught myself some basic Photoshop skills and morphed pictures of myself so I could see what I might look like as a Thin Person.  By the way, there are some good image manipulation programs that you can get for free on the internet.  Just sayin’.
• Reading inspiring stories about other real-life people who had lost a lot of weight did help, some.
• This is weird, but fun: I would buy one shirt at the thrift store that was just a little too small for me.  Then when no one was home, I played dress-up by wearing a couple belts around my tummy, and putting the shirt on over that and looking at myself in the mirror.  If you try this, don’t be stupid with the belts.  You do have vital organs in there, you know.

Beware the Scale

Weighing yourself is a two-edged sword.  When you’re on a regular exercise program, your weight is going to fluctuate for a variety of reasons.  Even if you're not lifting weights, there's a good chance you'll gain some muscle mass, especially if you're new to the form of exercise you've chosen.  That's the kind of weight gain that you need to rejoice over, because it means you're stronger.

Water retention is a terrible villain in this story, because countless folks trying to lose fat weigh themselves every day hoping to see some rewards for all their hard work, but become frustrated because their body is retaining water, making their weight stay the same, or even go up a bit.  When I lose fat, my weight tends to go through a long period of stagnation, followed by a sudden drop of several pounds.  If waiting through that stagnant period is going to frustrate you into giving up, STOP WEIGHING YOURSELF DAILY!  You don’t need that kind of stress.  Have someone hide the scale if you have to.

Let me ask you this: if a genie offered to remove from your body all the fat you wanted, and make you look fit and be healthy, on the condition that you'd still weigh as much as you do now, would your weight even matter that much?

Instead of your weight, pay attention to how your clothes fit.  Take progress pictures.  Measure your waist, or have a friend measure you.  If you absolutely must weigh yourself, don’t do it more often than weekly, and still take those numbers with a grain of salt.  

If you can afford it, buy a bathroom scale that measures your bodyfat percentage.  Keep in mind they’re not the most accurate way to measure your bodyfat, but they can give you a pretty good idea.  And it might help your peace of mind if you see your weight remaining the same but your bodyfat percentage going down, to know that you really are making progress.

Most Important of All

Have patience.  It's better to go slow.

The idea of losing lots of fat really quickly may be exciting and inspiring, but your body tends to react to such tactics by turning your metabolism dial way, way down, and turning your hunger and craving dials up to eleven.  And nothing is less exciting or inspirational than gaining all the fat back, plus ten percent.  Slow and steady wins the race.  Keep exercising, and finding excuses to love it.  Find that inspiration.

Plan occasional cheat meals, if it helps.  (But not frequently, and don’t go crazy!)  Remind yourself you’re not a Fat Person, you’re a Person Who Needs to Lose Fat.

Most importantly, you’re a person.  Read that again.  Sometimes we forget.

And I’ve got one more bit of advice: when you fall off the wagon, the wagon doesn’t leave without you!  Forgive yourself, and get back on the dang wagon!  Take the reins, drive that wagon, and you’ll get where you’re going.

I know you’ve got this.  Sometimes, you just have to convince yourself!
The Friendly Lifter 

Also don't miss...

Mind Games 1 (about diet)

Mind Games 2 (more on diet)

Mind Games 3 (exercise)

Momentum vs. Motivation

Mind Games 3: At the Gym

No, Seriously, This Stuff Worked for Me, Too...

Previously, on The Friendly Lifter:

I talked about all kinds of mind games that I play when I’m trying to eat more healthily.  Here are some more mind games that helped me get more fit; these are about exercising when you might not want to.  Remember that this is about doing something for your health and happiness, and you’re worth it.

Celebrate the Small Victories

The human brain has a sadly limited amount of patience.  Waiting around to see results on the scale or around our belt line takes too long for our impatient brains, and it doesn’t take long before we start to wonder why we even bother trying.  You need to find victories in the short term.  The sooner, the better.

What really made the biggest difference for me was learning to celebrate even the tiniest victory in my workouts as if they were a big deal.  Because every single victory IS A BIG FRIGGIN’ DEAL!  When you exercise, focus really, really hard on any moment that represents success or feels good.  Did you lift that weight one more time than you did last week?  Have a little party in your head!  Did you feel proud of yourself for getting out of the house and walking when you wanted to lie down on the couch?  Let that be a little imaginary trophy to go on your mental mantelpiece.  Did it feel good to stretch your muscles and feel them working?  Hold on to that feeling, because you're going to love it next time too!

Nothing is too small to celebrate, but sometimes you have to look carefully to find those things.  All those tiny little victories will pile up, and eventually, you are going to see a big victory in the mirror and on the scale.

And whatever you do, don’t let yourself dwell on setbacks.  There will be days when you’re extra tired, or you’re grumpy, or things just don’t work the way you want them to.   That’s a bump in the road, and we all have those.  Get over the bump and keep going.  You can even turn a bad day into a victory if you look at it the right way--sure your workout wasn’t great today, but you could have stayed home, and half a workout’s better than none.  Relax and get back at it tomorrow. 

Just Five Minutes

There is a side of me that is essentially a giant toddler, and he hates being forced to do anything he doesn’t wanna.  Mostly I love to exercise, but there are days when my toddler side comes out.  So just as I did when my son was little, I pretend the toddler might get his way, but we’ll see.  When it’s time to go to the gym for some cycling or treadmill and my whiny self is starting to cry, I tell myself I’ll just walk through the door and if I still don’t feel I can handle it when I get there, I’ll give myself permission to turn around and leave.

But once I’m there I think about how embarrassing it would be to just turn around and walk back out.  And I did come all this way, so I might as well get on the treadmill.  I tell my toddler self I’ll just do one minute, and then if I’m too tired, we can go home.  After one minute, I realize how silly I will look getting back off and I ask my toddler self if he really wants all these people to see me giving up after only one minute.  I can usually convince him that five minutes will look better; that’s just four more.  Once those five minutes are up, if I’m not completely exhausted, I typically play the Five More Minutes Game until I realize I’ve finished the entire workout.  Often, at some point during the session, the toddler in me realizes that this actually doesn’t suck that much, and I can get him to shut up.

Find Inspiration Rather Than Motivation

I often hear people talk about needing motivation to work out.  But I’ve observed that usually, we average folks look to pictures of super-fit or hyper-muscular people for motivation.  Those ultra-godlike celebrity people have absolutely worked their butts off for years, but remember that they probably also have huge genetic advantages and likely augment those advantages in ways average folks never could, due to expense, lack of access, or health concerns.  Sure it would be great to look like those people, but when you’ve been working out and logging every calorie for 6 months and still don’t look like them, motivation can turn to discouragement.

Instead, try finding inspiration.  Rather than idolizing the uber-athletic (as hard-working as they are), focus on the extra-tenacious.  Think about the person who overcomes adversity, who keeps going even when the crap gets crappier.  Maybe you can’t be 300 pounds of solid muscle, or a size negative 2, but you can be tough and tenacious, and you can do it right now.

Surely you can think of someone to inspire you.  It could be a celebrity who fought cancer and won, or a sports hero who came back from a terrifying injury.  It could be a relative or friend who goes for a jog even when the weather sucks.  It could be a book or movie character who refuses to be defeated by overwhelming odds.  It could be your dog, who is cheerful even when her leg is bandaged and she’s got that stupid cone on.

In my humble opinion, it’s far more practical and effective to strive for that kind of greatness.  Look what your inspirational person overcame.  If they did amazing things, you can do amazing things.  Even if it’s getting on that treadmill when you’ve had a long, crappy day.  I'm serious, that counts as amazing in my book!

Drop the Guilt

I know this is going to be very difficult for some of you.  I hear many people, women and men, say that they feel guilty for the time they take to go jogging or lift weights or do yoga because they feel like they should be spending it with their family.  And I do know it can make you feel like the worst Disney villain ever when you drop your sobbing kid off at the gym’s child care room.  But don’t forget that you are partly doing this because your family deserves a healthy, happy spouse and parent.  Plus, a good workout can help to clear your head and bring perspective to family problems that feel overwhelming and overly-charged with emotion.  Once you’re done, you’ll take a deep breath and maybe not be so upset over that broken jar of strawberry jelly this morning.

I know it’s hard to drop the guilt.  But you deserve this workout, and your family needs you to have it too.

Go on! Get in there!

The Friendly Lifter 

Also, don't miss...

Mind Games 2 (more on diet)

Mind Games 4 (motivation)