Mind Games 3: At the Gym

No, Seriously, This Stuff Worked for Me, Too...

Previously, on The Friendly Lifter:

I talked about all kinds of mind games that I play when I’m trying to eat more healthily.  Here are some more mind games that helped me get more fit; these are about exercising when you might not want to.  Remember that this is about doing something for your health and happiness, and you’re worth it.

Celebrate the Small Victories

The human brain has a sadly limited amount of patience.  Waiting around to see results on the scale or around our belt line takes too long for our impatient brains, and it doesn’t take long before we start to wonder why we even bother trying.  You need to find victories in the short term.  The sooner, the better.

What really made the biggest difference for me was learning to celebrate even the tiniest victory in my workouts as if they were a big deal.  Because every single victory IS A BIG FRIGGIN’ DEAL!  When you exercise, focus really, really hard on any moment that represents success or feels good.  Did you lift that weight one more time than you did last week?  Have a little party in your head!  Did you feel proud of yourself for getting out of the house and walking when you wanted to lie down on the couch?  Let that be a little imaginary trophy to go on your mental mantelpiece.  Did it feel good to stretch your muscles and feel them working?  Hold on to that feeling, because you're going to love it next time too!

Nothing is too small to celebrate, but sometimes you have to look carefully to find those things.  All those tiny little victories will pile up, and eventually, you are going to see a big victory in the mirror and on the scale.

And whatever you do, don’t let yourself dwell on setbacks.  There will be days when you’re extra tired, or you’re grumpy, or things just don’t work the way you want them to.   That’s a bump in the road, and we all have those.  Get over the bump and keep going.  You can even turn a bad day into a victory if you look at it the right way--sure your workout wasn’t great today, but you could have stayed home, and half a workout’s better than none.  Relax and get back at it tomorrow. 

Just Five Minutes

There is a side of me that is essentially a giant toddler, and he hates being forced to do anything he doesn’t wanna.  Mostly I love to exercise, but there are days when my toddler side comes out.  So just as I did when my son was little, I pretend the toddler might get his way, but we’ll see.  When it’s time to go to the gym for some cycling or treadmill and my whiny self is starting to cry, I tell myself I’ll just walk through the door and if I still don’t feel I can handle it when I get there, I’ll give myself permission to turn around and leave.

But once I’m there I think about how embarrassing it would be to just turn around and walk back out.  And I did come all this way, so I might as well get on the treadmill.  I tell my toddler self I’ll just do one minute, and then if I’m too tired, we can go home.  After one minute, I realize how silly I will look getting back off and I ask my toddler self if he really wants all these people to see me giving up after only one minute.  I can usually convince him that five minutes will look better; that’s just four more.  Once those five minutes are up, if I’m not completely exhausted, I typically play the Five More Minutes Game until I realize I’ve finished the entire workout.  Often, at some point during the session, the toddler in me realizes that this actually doesn’t suck that much, and I can get him to shut up.

Find Inspiration Rather Than Motivation

I often hear people talk about needing motivation to work out.  But I’ve observed that usually, we average folks look to pictures of super-fit or hyper-muscular people for motivation.  Those ultra-godlike celebrity people have absolutely worked their butts off for years, but remember that they probably also have huge genetic advantages and likely augment those advantages in ways average folks never could, due to expense, lack of access, or health concerns.  Sure it would be great to look like those people, but when you’ve been working out and logging every calorie for 6 months and still don’t look like them, motivation can turn to discouragement.

Instead, try finding inspiration.  Rather than idolizing the uber-athletic (as hard-working as they are), focus on the extra-tenacious.  Think about the person who overcomes adversity, who keeps going even when the crap gets crappier.  Maybe you can’t be 300 pounds of solid muscle, or a size negative 2, but you can be tough and tenacious, and you can do it right now.

Surely you can think of someone to inspire you.  It could be a celebrity who fought cancer and won, or a sports hero who came back from a terrifying injury.  It could be a relative or friend who goes for a jog even when the weather sucks.  It could be a book or movie character who refuses to be defeated by overwhelming odds.  It could be your dog, who is cheerful even when her leg is bandaged and she’s got that stupid cone on.

In my humble opinion, it’s far more practical and effective to strive for that kind of greatness.  Look what your inspirational person overcame.  If they did amazing things, you can do amazing things.  Even if it’s getting on that treadmill when you’ve had a long, crappy day.  I'm serious, that counts as amazing in my book!

Drop the Guilt

I know this is going to be very difficult for some of you.  I hear many people, women and men, say that they feel guilty for the time they take to go jogging or lift weights or do yoga because they feel like they should be spending it with their family.  And I do know it can make you feel like the worst Disney villain ever when you drop your sobbing kid off at the gym’s child care room.  But don’t forget that you are partly doing this because your family deserves a healthy, happy spouse and parent.  Plus, a good workout can help to clear your head and bring perspective to family problems that feel overwhelming and overly-charged with emotion.  Once you’re done, you’ll take a deep breath and maybe not be so upset over that broken jar of strawberry jelly this morning.

I know it’s hard to drop the guilt.  But you deserve this workout, and your family needs you to have it too.

Go on! Get in there!

The Friendly Lifter 

Also, don't miss...

Mind Games 2 (more on diet)

Mind Games 4 (motivation)