Momentum vs. Motivation

"I Just Need Some Motivation…"

Whenever and wherever fitness is being discussed, the word “motivation” comes up endlessly.  And I totally get it.  In evolutionary terms, we still haven’t developed beyond the psychology of the hunter-gatherer, and our bodies and minds still kinda see the world in those terms.  “Exercise”?  Just, do strenuous things that don’t result in food or self defense or sex?  Waste of energy.  Forget it.  We are programmed to conserve that energy, just in case.

BUT!  The human body is uniquely designed to be challenged and put to work, so evolution is not entirely working against you.

This tension between conserving energy and storing fat on one side, versus putting your body to work and being healthy on the other side, is where a lot of “motivation” talk comes from.  People know intellectually that they should be healthy and that they want to look awesome, but there’s still that pull toward laziness that we all feel.  Most folks would say that motivation is there to bridge the gap between lazy and healthy.

Go online and search for exercise motivation, and you will be drowning in it.  You will read frightening statistics about what will happen to you if you miss your workout.  You will chuckle over attitude-filled one-liners.  You will be treated to uplifting quotes about determination and grit.  You will shed a tear over someone’s life journey.  You will see inspiring photos of skinny or muscular people covered in sweat.  Eagles will soar.  Ships will majestically sail.  Men will land on the moon again and again.

And sometimes, that stuff helps.  But all too often, that kind of motivation is usually good enough to get us back into our workout shoes only once.  The effect wears off quickly when confronted with that voice inside us that says, “But I don’t wanna!”

The Hole

I have a name for the feeling of resistance to working out.  I call it “The Hole”.  You have to climb out of that Hole before you can get to work.  If you don’t climb out, you stay on the couch feeling simultaneously relieved and filled with shame.  The Hole will be deeper or shallower, depending on a million variables from your mental and physical state to the weather to how much effort it takes to find a matching pair of socks.  But getting out of The Hole takes effort.

Sure, motivation can be that extra little bit that gets you out of your Hole and gets you moving.  But there’s something else that is more important for keeping you on your path to fitness: momentum.

Building Momentum

Getting out of your Hole does get easier over time.  (If you’re shaking your head and laughing bitterly right now, it’s possible you’re forcing yourself to do a form of exercise that’s just not suited to you.  In that case, I’d like to invite you to stop here and read another of my posts, called "The Exercise Dating Game".)

Building momentum tends to happen in stages:
The Not-So-Bad Stage – If you work out regularly enough, you start to have more positive than negative thoughts about exercising.  It’s even better if you can focus really fiercely on those positive experiences.  Climbing out of your Hole is more like stepping out of a bucket.
The Automatic Stage – Over time, working out is just part of your week.  You tend to hop right over your Hole without even entering it.
The Don’t-Get-In-My-Way Stage – You can’t imagine your life without exercise as part of it, and it really ticks you off when something interferes with your workout.  Hole?  What Hole?

We all have setbacks, sometimes big ones.  Injuries, illness, life events both good and bad.  If you need to, put up a motivational poster in your Hole for the occasions when you fall into it.  And if you miss a few sessions, forgive yourself and get back on the horse.  Don’t leave room in your hole for self-loathing.  Do leave room in your hole for a ladder.

Consistency is the key here.  Set yourself a schedule and do your very best to keep to it.  Get up early and get to the gym before work.  Go for that walk during your lunch break.  Keep that time in the evening sacred for when you go biking.  Enlist a friend if it helps.

Try not to think about IF you are going to exercise, just WHEN.

Some Kinds of Motivation Are More Effective

I don’t mean to tell you that all motivation sucks, just that some kinds aren’t as effective as momentum is at keeping you on your exercise program.  Everyone is different, but certain things are pretty effective for many people.  Maybe one of these will keep your head in the game when you start to lose that momentum:

• Reminding yourself that you want to be healthy for your spouse/child/parent/etc.
• Buying a great outfit that’s just a bit too small, and trying it on from time to time
• Remembering that your grandparent/parent/sibling had heart disease/fatty liver/diabetes/etc. and you want to avoid ending up with the same health problem
• Proving to your critics, real or imagined, that you’re better than they said you are...those jerks
• Pretending you’re someone, real or fictional, who you really look up to, and nothing can stop you (seriously, this worked for me)

I PROMISE this exercise business gets easier, the more you keep at it.  You’re going to get there.  Just keep going!
The Friendly Lifter

Finding Fitness Truth

Good advice can be hard to find.  Here are some ways to find the wisdom needle in the information haystack.

Avoiding the Extremes

Sometimes, you will get two pieces of advice that seem to conflict, but that are actually both pointing you to a middle ground.  “Too many cooks spoil the broth” seems to be the exact opposite of “Many hands make light the work.”  But actually, both are true.  It’s just that there’s a sweet spot between doing a job all by yourself and having a hundred people barging in.

For a fitness example?  I hear people swear that the sauna has many health benefits, but others caution it can make you dehydrated.  Well, they’re both right.  (Except the folks who say the heat of the sauna will make you lose fat.  That's wrong.)  If you want to use the sauna, there’s some good evidence that it has health benefits—just make sure you’re getting enough water, because you’re going to sweat in there and you need to replace those fluids.

Here’s another one.  Creatine is just about the only fitness supplement that has been scientifically proven to be helpful with your workouts.  But!!!  There was that 16-year-old in [pick a state] who collapsed during a [pick a sport] game because he had taken too much creatine.  Well, yeah, 16-year-olds are not renowned for their good judgement.  Assuming the story is true, the kid probably took some obscenely large mega dose and not enough water and yeah, that wouldn’t have been good for him.  But if you take the recommended dose and make sure you’re well-hydrated—that is important—then creatine can help you recover more quickly from high-effort activities like sprinting and weight training, and can help with the development of lean muscle tissue.

Are you seeing a pattern?  Moderation.  Two people pointing in opposite directions might be pointing to the same place.  Go to that place.

Sure It’s True, But for Whom?

Fitness folks tend to assume that the whole world has the same goals, experience, and body type as they do.  And unfortunately, many will make broad, sweeping statements based on what has worked for them without really checking—or caring—whether their statement applies to the person they’re hollering at.  And when another of these zealots with differing goals, experience, and body type starts to holler back, things can get ugly…and bewildering for the poor, inexperienced bystander who just wanted to know where the drinking fountain is.  Here are some classics you’re bound to hear at one point or another:

• Always work out fasted.  (This may be true for people doing cardio to burn fat)
• Never go to the gym on an empty stomach.  (Definitely good advice if you’re planning to lift weights)
• You must do the Big 3 Lifts: bench press, squats, and deadlifts.  (If your goal is to get very strong or compete as a powerlifter, definitely yes.)
• There are plenty of great alternatives to the Big 3 Lifts.  (True, especially if you’re more into building muscle size or lifting for overall health rather than getting massively strong.)
• Deadlifts will kill your back.  (If you use bad form or too much weight, they will.  But they’re also a terrible idea for people with unresolved back injuries.  Or other injuries, for that matter.)
• Deadlifts will save your back.  (Maybe.  They sure helped mine.  But again, deadlifts are for strengthening a weak body, not for healing a broken one.)
• I did XYZ and look at me!  So you should do XYZ too!  (Good for them.  And XYZ might work for you, but maybe not.  Do some research.)
• Just work through the pain.  (If your muscles are slightly sore from a workout you did a few days ago, you’ll probably be okay.  If your pain feels like an injury, it’s terrible advice to work through it without the advice of a doctor or trained physical therapist.*)
• * By the way, I’ve been known to work through the pain even when I shouldn’t have.  It was stupid.  Full disclosure.

Most importantly, beware of claims that this or that is best for you, if the person speaking doesn’t know much about you, your body, your goals, and your previous experience.  I’ve even heard tales of personal trainers who launched their client into a workout program without asking about previous injuries or even asking serious questions about the client’s prior experience.  When someone does that to you, thank them for the advice (you’ll never get anywhere by arguing with them) and walk away.

How to Get Better Advice

If you ask people online or in person for diet or workout advice, any suggestions you get will be completely worthless if you haven’t given them any context.  Are you trying to burn fat?  Build muscle? Develop stamina?  Get stronger?  Improve your performance in cycling?  Or swimming? Or pogo stick?  Are you a rank beginner, seasoned veteran, or somewhere in between?  Any injuries in your past that might be relevant?  Diabetes?  Food allergies?  Are you going to a gym or working out at home, where you might not have access to a wide array of equipment?

If you go to a bunch of people and just ask, “How can I get fit?”, you’ll get advice.  Oh boy, will you get it.  But most of it likely won’t be useful or applicable to you.  Here are some examples of better ways to ask:

“I really enjoy using my stationary bike.  I’m looking to burn fat, and I’ve been doing 30-minute sessions and even though I’m getting faster, I’m not losing fat like I used to.  What can I do to re-energize my fat loss?”

“I’m 39 years old and I’d like to build some muscle, but I’ve never lifted weights before, and have no idea what I’m doing.  How should I approach my first few workouts?  And where can I find a good eating plan to help me build that muscle without putting on much fat?”

“I’ve been lifting for a couple years now, and I’m doing well on everything except the squat.  Every time I try to squat, my ankles and knees hurt a lot.  Are there certain form mistakes that commonly cause that?”

Sometimes It’s Okay to Ignore Advice

Give careful consideration to advice you get from people who seem knowledgeable and sane.  Much of what you hear will be solid wisdom for most people, most of the time.  But it’s your body and your diet and your workout, and even advice that was excellent for someone else may not be the best choice for you.  In the end, you need to do something that doesn’t hurt you, that you enjoy, and that helps you make the progress you’re looking for.  Don’t let people paralyze you or bully you into doing something that seems like a bad idea or a waste of time.  Listen to the advice, do a bit of research, make your own decision, and move forward.

I’ll tell you a secret.  That’s the best any of us can do.

Stay sane out there!
The Friendly Lifter

Quick Take: Beware of Bro Science

If you spend much time in the men’s locker room of a gym, you’re eventually going to hear someone spouting nonsense. (Ladies, you’ll have to take my word for this, but somehow I don’t think you’ll be shocked.)  A lot of the nonsense you hear is based on “bro science”: reasoning that seems to make sense but is not backed up by actual facts. 

One example of this is guys claiming the surest way to gain more muscle is to change your workout program every single week.  The logic here is that your muscles adapt to the same stimulus over time, and thus that stimulus (exercise) becomes less effective over time.  This is true.  Therefore, you must change up your exercise routine every time you work out.  This is the bogus part.  In reality, your body develops best with a certain amount of consistency as well as variety.  Most expert advice I’ve read recommends that you keep the same routines for at least 6 weeks--often more like 12 weeks--before evaluating whether a change is needed.  And if you’re making satisfactory progress, most experts recommend you keep doing what’s working, or only make minor changes.

Other examples of bogus fitness ideas:

• You can target specific areas of the body—i.e., the belly—for fat loss.  Sorry, you can't.  Current science says it’s kinda sorta barely possible in certain rare and extremely difficult circumstances, but really just forget it.
• Starving yourself is a good idea.  NO.  Severely restricting your calorie intake can actually backfire when your body throws itself into starvation mode and turns your metabolism way, way down.  There are options that can work, like keto diets or intermittent fasting, but do your research.
• ANYTHING that promises dramatic results in a few weeks.  No, no, no.  Sorry.  No.
• No pain, no gain.  OMG, just because it rhymes doesn’t make it true.  Look, if I put you on a torture rack for 45 minutes, you’d come out sore.  But you wouldn’t gain muscle or lose fat.  A good workout might make you sore, but lack of soreness doesn’t necessarily indicate a failed workout.
• Go big or go home.  I hear this motto spouted more frequently by guys who desperately want to sound badass than by lifters who actually are.  There is good evidence to support heavy lifting to help you build strength and muscle size, but that doesn’t mean you need to make veins explode at every workout.
• It’s impossible to lose fat while gaining muscle.  Actually, I’ve done it.  But mostly this works for beginners.  If you’re a seasoned bodybuilder trying to go from 8% bodyfat to 5%, then probably not.
• You’re going to have to suffer if you want to lose fat.   Actually, I’m rarely hungry when I’m losing fat, but I have to plan my meals intelligently.
• The sauna, or some other heat source, or—heaven preserve us—Sauna Suits will melt your fat away.  You will lose weight: all the water you sweat out.  But no, they won’t make you lose fat, even if you risk a trip to the ER by exercising while severely dehydrated.  Sorry.
• Cardio will destroy your muscle gains.  Really?  I wonder how college and pro football players get so fast and stay so buff.  There are better and worse ways to mix cardio with weight training, but they can be compatible.
• I could go on.  Unfortunately, this is a hole with no bottom.

So if you hear someone recommend something that conflicts with other advice, consider the two sources.  If one has more training and experience than the other, you should go with them.  If both seem equally trustworthy (or suspicious), do some research from more expert sources before you listen to one over the other.

Stay safe and sane out there!
The Friendly Lifter

Eating, Part 2...Warning: This Post Contains MATH!!!

There's lots of confusion out there regarding eating to grow muscle (bulking) versus eating to lose fat (cutting).  I'm not a nutritionist, but I have learned a few things I can share.

Eat, Eat, Eat for Muscle Growth.  

This has almost never been a problem for me--I've always had to focus on losing fat--but people who tend to think in terms of gaining weight rather than losing weight need to focus really hard on eating enough to support their lifting.  It’s not uncommon for me to hear folks--mostly skinny folks--say they feel like they’re already eating enough to choke a horse, but that they’re still not gaining any muscle or getting stronger.  I hate to say it, but they’re probably not eating enough calories, or getting enough protein.

Precisely how many calories, you say?  You want the exact number of grams of protein you need, perhaps?  You might try this calculator.  Just remember, you might need to make adjustments to what it tells you after you’ve tried it for a while.  For hypertrophy (muscle growth), I have heard guidelines that range from 0.7 grams of protein per pound of body weight all the way up to a rather extreme 3.0 grams per pound.  The calculator at the link above uses a safe, generic guideline of 1.0 g of protein per pound of body weight, which might be perfect for you.

The problem with any one-size-fits-all number is that different bodies process nutrients differently.  On top of that, a marathon runner has very different needs from a powerlifter.  For that matter, you may hear larger numbers thrown around that are intended for someone on steroids.  

A more personalized method is to write down every single thing you eat or drink for a week and track your protein, carbs, and fat.  Then, increase your protein intake until you start to see satisfactory progress.  This cautious approach will also let you avoid gaining fat as much as possible, since you’re not making big, abrupt changes to your diet.

If you’re trying to gain muscle, don’t severely restrict your intake of carbohydrates.  Protein helps build muscle, but carbs are the fuel for those muscles.  Carbs also physically add fullness to your muscles.  People on low-carb diets often report that their muscles appear “flatter”.

Try to eat more often, if you can.  Many people find it’s easier to eat 6 moderate meals a day than 3 huge ones.  But if that’s not going to fly, don’t stress about it.  3 or 4 meals a day is fine, if that’s all you can manage.  Just make sure those meals have plenty of protein, and are accompanied by nice, big glasses of water.  Try to get at least some protein every time you eat something, even if it’s just a snack.

Having trouble squeezing in enough protein?  Protein shakes are a godsend for many people in your situation.  Choking down enough chicken breasts or fish steaks to get all the protein you need can be very unappetizing; sipping on a protein shake is often much more palatable.  If you’re really desperate to get more calories, throw your protein powder in a blender and add in almond milk or whole milk, peanut butter, raw pasteurized eggs, or other nutritious, high-calorie foods.  I find protein shakes give me gas, so my wife threatens divorce if I don’t add two fast-acting lactase tablets to each shake (the best-known brand is Lactaid but I get Costco’s Kirkland brand).

Eat Carefully for Fat Loss.  Just Don’t Starve Yourself.

(If I lose you at some point here, be sure to check out the end of my article, where the formulas are easier to read.)

If you’re looking to lose fat, good news: there’s more agreement about guidelines for how much to eat, but there’s still variation.  A common formula for how to balance your macronutrients (protein, carbs, and fat) is to take in 40% of your calories from protein, 40% from carbs, and 20% from fat.  Notice that I said calories and not grams.  That is an important distinction.

As far as actual raw numbers, I regularly hear people suggest you eat 0.5 to 1.5 grams of protein per pound of lean bodyweight in your body.  If you’re over about 20% bodyfat, you should find out as accurately as possible what your bodyfat percent is; 100 minus that number is a good estimate of your lean bodyweight percent.  Multiply your bodyweight times your lean percentage and that’s the bodyweight you should plug into the eating formula.  If I just lost you, look at the end of this article for a chart that might be easier to understand.

Once you know how many grams of protein you’re going to need, you’ll know to take in an equal amount of carbs.  For fat intake, you’ll need to do some math.  Multiply your grams of protein by 4 to get the number of calories of protein.  Cut that number in half, and that’s how many calories you need from fat.  Divide that number by 9 to find out how many grams of fat that is.  Sorry, it’s not going to be much.

But pay attention to what I’m about to say: THESE ARE ONLY GUIDELINES.  Starting points.  You are going to have to do some balancing and adjusting and experimentation to find out what works for you.  When I work on losing fat, I am most successful with a caloric balance of 45% protein, 35% carbs, and 20% fat.  I’m not saying you should follow my example, I’m saying you shouldn’t take anyone’s example and stick to it slavishly.  You’re going to need to do some tweaking to find what works best for you.

Even If You're Not Interested in Losing Fat, Don't Go Crazy...

There is a diet philosophy among some powerlifters and strength builders that you just need to eat as much as you want of whatever you want, whenever you want.  These are often men and women who aren’t that concerned with seeing their abs, but who are always chasing after a new personal strength record.  And although I behold powerlifters and strength athletes with a considerable amount of awe in my heart, I also worry about the condition of theirs if all they’re consuming is triple bacon cheeseburgers with chili fries and a shake.

No matter what, it’s good advice to emphasize lean protein and vegetables, to drink lots of water, and to cut out as much sugar from your diet as you can.

What About Timing of Meals?

Most expert advice I’ve read agrees that right after your muscles have worked very hard, they are eager to soak up all the carbohydrates they possibly can.  What this means for you, is that the meal right after you come from the gym should have at least some carbs.  Also, if you are going to splurge on something maybe a little sugary today, the best time would be right after your workout.  That doesn’t mean you can eat a dozen donuts without consequences, though.

There is a widely-quoted theory that you have to consume some protein within 30 minutes of exercise, or your body will start to break down muscle tissue, rather than build it up.  There’s an increasing amount of research coming out lately that disagrees and says that the timing isn’t nearly as critical.  And I believe that research.  Yet, I still make sure I have a protein shake in my locker for immediately after my workout.  Old habits die hard, I guess.

There is also a popular theory that your body can only absorb a limited amount of protein at once.  I frequently hear 30 grams quoted as a maximum.  There is evidence that disputes this notion, but the notion has been around a long time, and has a lot of support out there.  I’m just going to say that, based on my personal experience and what I’ve read, I’m skeptical that such a maximum exists, or if it does, that the max is 30 grams.  Do some internet research if you want.  I’ll just wait here and drink that protein shake from my locker.

Speaking of timing, you may want to look into intermittent fasting as an option for fat loss.  That’s where you only eat for a specific portion of the day, and fast (don’t eat) the rest of the day.  I have read a lot of convincing evidence that it can work for many people, but I haven’t tried it and don’t know much about it.  Personally, I can’t bear the idea of not eating for significant chunks of the day.  I think I would cry a lot.  But if that sounds like something you could handle, I encourage you to do some research.

For a Lot of Calculations, You Need to Know Your Lean Body Weight

Step 1: Find out what your body fat percentage is, meaning how much of your body weight is from fat.  Getting a perfectly precise number is almost impossible, so try for the closest percentage you can reasonably get.  You could buy a bathroom scale that measures your body fat based on sending a minuscule electric current through your body (you won’t even feel it).  It’s not super accurate, but is probably fine.  Or you could get a professional to measure you with calipers.  Or you could go to a really fancy place and get scanned or dunked in a pool.  

Step 2: It’s time for some math: 

100 - body fat percentage = lean percentage (how much of your body isn’t fat)

total body weight x lean percentage = lean body weight

What Balance of Macronutrients Should I Eat for Fat Loss?

THESE ARE ONLY GUIDELINES!  Try using the numbers you get from these formulas, but be willing to nudge them around if they don’t seem to be working for you.

lean body weight x 1.2 = protein grams to eat
lean body weight x 1.2 = carbohydrate grams to eat
lean body weight x .27 = fat grams to eat

Another Method

THESE ARE ONLY GUIDELINES!  Try using the numbers you get from these formulas, but be willing to nudge them around if they don’t seem to be working for you.

This link takes you to a calculator to estimate how many calories you should have as a target:

                                                                                  “/” means “divided by”

Target calories x .4 = calories from protein              protein calories / 4 = protein grams
Target calories x .4 = calories from carbs                 carb calories / 4 = carb grams
Target calories x .2 = calories from fat                     fat calories / 9 = fat grams 


I know I've thrown a lot of math at you, but remember, it's worth the trouble!  If you can lift heavy stuff, you can do this too!
The Friendly Lifter

Eat More, or Less?

There’s a popular saying among fitness folks that “abs are made in the kitchen”.  If you want people to be impressed with your muscles, you do need to make them bigger.  But muscles appear more impressive--bigger, even--when they’re not covered in a thick layer of fat.  

What and how to eat are very thorny questions whose answers change depending on your goals, your daily activity level, and the fact that your body processes nutrients in its own unique way.  And I’m not a nutritionist, but I’ve read a bunch and can share what little I know. 

First, Some Basic Vocabulary.

Your diet is built from three kinds of food, called macronutrients: protein, carbohydrates (carbs), and fats.  These macronutrients (macros for short) are all important for your body to remain healthy, and for you to achieve your fitness goals.

Proteins are most abundant in meats, including fish, and eggs.  You can also find proteins in dairy products, nuts, and certain plant-based products, but the proteins in those foods are typically mixed in with more carbs and fats, unless the food has been processed to separate out the proteins.  Your body uses protein as material to build and repair muscles and other kinds of tissue, and to a lesser extent as an energy source.

Carbohydrates come from grains, fruits, vegetables, and other similar foods, and are your body’s favorite energy source.  There are complex carbohydrates--starches and fibers--and simple carbohydrates--sugars.  Complex carbs digest slowly and keep your body’s energy levels more stable; simple carbs digest quickly, which can result in wide swings in energy levels.  Although simple carbs aren’t always evil, it’s a good general rule to emphasize complex carbs in your diet.

Fats can be found in meat, eggs, nuts, seeds, oils, and other foods like avocados.  Fats have been vilified for many years as the cause of obesity, but they are needed in your body to transport fat-soluble vitamins and perform other functions; recent research is finding that sugars are at least as guilty of causing obesity, if not more so.  Your body also uses fats as an energy source.

Each gram of carbs has 4 calories.  Each gram of protein also has 4 calories.  Each gram of fat has 9 calories.  (And you might as well know that a gram of pure alcohol has 7 calories.)

Can I Gain Muscle and Lose Fat at the Same Time?

The simplest advice for how to lose fat is to eat fewer calories than you spend through exercise.  When your body needs the extra energy to fuel your exercise, it will burn the fat it has stored throughout your body.  This is called a “caloric deficit”.  

The simplest advice for how to gain muscle or get stronger is to eat more calories than you spend through exercise.  If your body is going to build muscle, it needs the extra energy.  This is called a “caloric surplus”.  

Can you do both at the same time?  Couldn’t you, like, work out a lot, eat moderately, and convince your body to burn fat and use that energy to build muscle?  Some folks call such a process “body recomposition” or just “recomp” for short.  There are plenty of people who say that recomping is absolutely, categorically impossible, period.  The world will end before such a thing would ever happen.  But I have done it, and I know others who have.  Just know that there are asterisks all over the place here.

If you are quite a bit overweight, fairly new to weight training, very serious, and willing to go slowly, your chances are better.  Eat at a slight calorie surplus, emphasize lean proteins and vegetables, and cut as much sugar out as you can.  On the other hand, if you’re fairly lean already (compared to most Americans), are pretty experienced at weight training, or want results quickly, you shouldn’t expect to be able to do both.  But there are still options for you, so don’t give up!

EDIT: I just found this article about recomping. It's probably even better advice.

Bulking and Cutting

Most experienced athletes, models, and People You Wish You Could Look Like follow a two-cycle process.  Part of the time, they focus on losing fat: they maintain a caloric deficit, lift weights, and do cardio like running or cycling.  This part of the cycle is called “cutting”.  The bad news is, if you’re too ambitious at cutting, you risk the possibility that your body will break down muscle tissue for energy instead of burning fat.  So you can’t just starve yourself if you don’t want to lose your hard-won gains.

The opposite of cutting is “bulking”, where you maintain a caloric surplus and lift weights.  Maybe cardio, but typically not.  But you can’t just go crazy and eat everything that doesn’t run away fast enough.  Too much of a caloric surplus means you gain fat.  Most folks resign themselves to gaining a little bit of fat during their bulking cycle, and consider it the cost of doing business.  Once they feel like they need to lean down again, they start another cutting cycle.  It’s all a back-and-forth game, but over the long haul, you get to where you want your body to be.

People often wonder which process they should embark on first.  Sometimes they work themselves into paralysis over this question.  My personal philosophy is, look in the mirror and decide which you’d like to see more: a leaner you, with more muscle definition, or a bigger stronger you, with more muscle tone or size (those are actually the same thing).  Whichever one is more important to you will tell you whether to cut or bulk first.  Don’t get paralyzed, just pick one.  It’s not a huge deal, as long as you plan to do both over the long term.

If you still want someone to tell you what to do, cut first.  That’s the advice I hear more often.

What if you’re already lean enough, and just want to get nice and big?  Then only bulk.  What if you just really, really want to be as lean as you possibly can?  Then only cut.

And by the way, have you seen those pictures of the pro bodybuilders with the scary-bulging muscles and veins popping out everywhere who look like you could drop a car on them and the car would get cut in half?  You should know that they don’t look like that all the time.  They are bulking through a good portion of the year (called “off-season”) and embark on an extreme cutting cycle a few months before competition.  They also have one set of steroids for bulking, and a different set for cutting.  All those photos you’ve seen were probably taken within a week or two of a bodybuilding competition.  Most of the year they just look like really, really big guys who could crush you with their pinky, but don’t have that cut-like-a-diamond look.  Just thought you should know.

In my next post, I'll talk more about details for how eating to lose fat is different from eating to gain muscle.

Don't miss it!
The Friendly Lifter

Don't Leave Your Brains in the Locker

Something that shocks people all the time is just how much thinking is required to make progress in the gym.  Sure you need muscles to move those weights around, but if you don't bring your brain along, you're mostly wasting time.  Here are some ways you can engage your brain muscle to help strengthen your other muscles.

Have a Plan.  

When you arrive at the gym for a workout, you should already know what you’re going to do.  You could be really obsessive like me, and write down every exercise, set, and rep you plan to do for the week on Sunday night.  Or you could have a looser plan, like “I’ll start with bench press, do some cable flyes, triceps extensions, and dips, then I’ll see if I’m up to any more than that.”  But you should have a plan of some kind.  The more specific, the better.

There are a tiny number of people in the world who can do all of this by instinct.  But a large proportion of people who think they can go by instinct, actually can’t. 

Do Good-Quality Reps 98% of the Time.

Every day I see folks who could improve their form to get better results.  But unless someone specifically asks me, I mind my own business.  In many gyms that’s just the unwritten rule.  If you feel like you are working hard but just spinning your wheels, force yourself to take a good, hard look at your form on every single exercise.  Watch some videos online.  And use your brain to visualize each step of the movement before you begin.

Maybe ask someone who seems knowledgeable and sane for form advice on a particular exercise.  Using bad form can put you at risk of injury, but even if that weren’t an issue, bad form would also be a concern because it tends to rob you of the progress you should be making.

The number one example of this that I’ve seen lately at my gym is guys (it’s always guys) using too much weight on the bicep curl.  They’ll grab a bar that’s 20 to 40 pounds too heavy, then on each rep, do this peculiar throwing motion with their whole body to get the bar to go up.  Sure, they are moving a lot of weight, but they’re not going to impress any experienced lifters.  And their biceps are getting very little stimulation, meaning they’re wasting their valuable gym time doing something that’s not going to help them progress.

A better way would be to go lighter on the weight and hold it while standing tall with their elbows close to their sides.  They should move the bar by only bending their elbows; every other part of the body should pretty much remain still, except at the top of the rep, when it’s okay to bring the upper arms slightly upward.  The biceps are responsible for bending the elbow, and to a lesser extent for raising the angle of the upper arm.  Actively moving the torso forward or backward, or bending the legs during the rep, are signs that you’re likely using bad form.

There is a legitimate function for “cheat” reps, where you break form at the end of a set to get that last little bit of effort out.  But the vast majority of people cheat more than they should.

Build Your Mind-Muscle Connection.

The greater your ability to intensely contract and relax a muscle, the better your “mind-muscle connection” is with that muscle.  Try this next time you’re on the leg extension machine.  At the top of the rep, when you have extended your ankles all the way up, squeeze the muscles on top of your thighs as hard as you can.  You may even see them bulge.  You’re using your mind-muscle connection with your quad muscles.

It’s this connection that lets muscle guys make their pecs dance.  It’s also this connection that helps your muscles get more out of your exercises.  When you do biceps curls, squeeze your muscle really hard when the weight is at the “top” of the rep (after you’ve lifted it all the way up).  Try it with triceps cable pushdowns (the “top” of the rep will seem like the bottom because of the direction of movement) and various weight machines.

Get Good, Credible Information from Sources Other Than This One.

Read, read, read.  Just make sure you are reading good-quality material and not crap.  I strongly recommend the articles on these websites:

www.t-nation.com My favorite.  The look of this site is a bit hard-core, but the information is top-quality, and they have a really good mix of articles aimed at all different experience levels.  Their writers aren’t afraid to give you a little tough love, and sometimes that’s exactly what we all need.

www.bodybuilding.com A great site, even for people who don’t think of themselves as bodybuilders.  Straightforward and professional writing about weight training, nutrition, cardio, and lots of other stuff.

www.livestrong.com A site that has a more approachable feel, especially for beginners.  Still lots of excellent advice and information.

www.muscleandstrength.com Also a bit more hard-core in appearance, this site is still a gold mine of good information for all experience levels.

These sites all do a good job of taking beginners seriously, and of treating women as athletes and not eye candy.  There are many other sites out there that also do a good job; I’ve just listed my personal favorites.

I suggest you avoid forums, message boards, and comment sections, even the ones featured on the websites above.  Or at least take them with a huge grain of salt.  Professional writers need to make sure the information they present is of good quality, or their reputations will take a hit.  Some random guy answering some other random guy’s question may provide excellent advice, or may be touting some truly terrible ideas.  Also, keep in mind these sites have to pay the bills, and that means ads, including ads for bogus products and services.


Don't stop progressing!  Learn stuff, then lift stuff, then write stuff down!
The Friendly Lifter

Mind Games 4: Taking the Reins

There's a movement out there encouraging people to have a more positive body image, no matter what kind of shape they're in.  It's sort of push-back against the long-standing tradition of fat-shaming that has become almost a national pastime.  I totally sympathize with folks who are sick to death of the world assuming they're lazy, stupid, or ugly just because they're not as fit as the models on that Ab Roller commercial.  But I'd also like to remind everyone that being overweight does have health issues that go with it.  Please don't try to get fit just to appease the @$$-holes.  But please do keep trying to get fit for your health and happiness.

Re-imagine Yourself

For the first forty years of my life, I saw myself as a Fat Person who was therefore clumsy and ugly and hopelessly unathletic.  It is astonishing to me how much Being Fat was pretty much my whole identity.  One of the biggest struggles I’ve faced was seeing myself as a Person Who Needs to Lose Some Fat, as opposed to a Fat Person.  It may seem like a pointless distinction to someone who’s never been fat, but the rest of us understand there's a colossal difference there.

You might think it’s impossible to reconfigure how you look at yourself, but it can be done.  I did a number of things to convince myself that Being Fat was not my eternal destiny:

• I taught myself some basic Photoshop skills and morphed pictures of myself so I could see what I might look like as a Thin Person.  By the way, there are some good image manipulation programs that you can get for free on the internet.  Just sayin’.
• Reading inspiring stories about other real-life people who had lost a lot of weight did help, some.
• This is weird, but fun: I would buy one shirt at the thrift store that was just a little too small for me.  Then when no one was home, I played dress-up by wearing a couple belts around my tummy, and putting the shirt on over that and looking at myself in the mirror.  If you try this, don’t be stupid with the belts.  You do have vital organs in there, you know.

Beware the Scale

Weighing yourself is a two-edged sword.  When you’re on a regular exercise program, your weight is going to fluctuate for a variety of reasons.  Even if you're not lifting weights, there's a good chance you'll gain some muscle mass, especially if you're new to the form of exercise you've chosen.  That's the kind of weight gain that you need to rejoice over, because it means you're stronger.

Water retention is a terrible villain in this story, because countless folks trying to lose fat weigh themselves every day hoping to see some rewards for all their hard work, but become frustrated because their body is retaining water, making their weight stay the same, or even go up a bit.  When I lose fat, my weight tends to go through a long period of stagnation, followed by a sudden drop of several pounds.  If waiting through that stagnant period is going to frustrate you into giving up, STOP WEIGHING YOURSELF DAILY!  You don’t need that kind of stress.  Have someone hide the scale if you have to.

Let me ask you this: if a genie offered to remove from your body all the fat you wanted, and make you look fit and be healthy, on the condition that you'd still weigh as much as you do now, would your weight even matter that much?

Instead of your weight, pay attention to how your clothes fit.  Take progress pictures.  Measure your waist, or have a friend measure you.  If you absolutely must weigh yourself, don’t do it more often than weekly, and still take those numbers with a grain of salt.  

If you can afford it, buy a bathroom scale that measures your bodyfat percentage.  Keep in mind they’re not the most accurate way to measure your bodyfat, but they can give you a pretty good idea.  And it might help your peace of mind if you see your weight remaining the same but your bodyfat percentage going down, to know that you really are making progress.

Most Important of All

Have patience.  It's better to go slow.

The idea of losing lots of fat really quickly may be exciting and inspiring, but your body tends to react to such tactics by turning your metabolism dial way, way down, and turning your hunger and craving dials up to eleven.  And nothing is less exciting or inspirational than gaining all the fat back, plus ten percent.  Slow and steady wins the race.  Keep exercising, and finding excuses to love it.  Find that inspiration.

Plan occasional cheat meals, if it helps.  (But not frequently, and don’t go crazy!)  Remind yourself you’re not a Fat Person, you’re a Person Who Needs to Lose Fat.

Most importantly, you’re a person.  Read that again.  Sometimes we forget.

And I’ve got one more bit of advice: when you fall off the wagon, the wagon doesn’t leave without you!  Forgive yourself, and get back on the dang wagon!  Take the reins, drive that wagon, and you’ll get where you’re going.

I know you’ve got this.  Sometimes, you just have to convince yourself!
The Friendly Lifter 

Also don't miss...

Mind Games 1 (about diet)

Mind Games 2 (more on diet)

Mind Games 3 (exercise)

Momentum vs. Motivation

Mind Games 1: Food, Glorious Food

No, Seriously, It Worked for Me

Okay, I know some percentage of you all are going to read a few sentences here and instantly reject it as utter, ridiculous nonsense.  Others will say, “That’s all very well, but it would never work for me.”  And I’ve come to terms with that, but my response is: Just try it.  Literally no one else has to know what you’re doing, so there’s no risk if it doesn’t work.

What I’m talking about is, playing mind games with yourself.  When I started to eat more healthily and visit the gym on a daily basis, one thing that helped immensely was engaging in the many varieties of mental gymnastics you will see below and in the next few posts.  Yes, of course I knew I was doing it, as I was doing it.  I just shoved that particular awareness aside and did it anyway.  And maybe these tricks worked because I am more imaginative (or unstable!) than other people.  But really, I’d love for you to take at least one of these ideas and adapt it for your own purposes.  There’s literally no risk, so just try it!

Stall Through the Moment of Danger

Often, when I want a food I shouldn’t eat, it’s because I just saw that food and had an instantaneous, impulsive reaction to reach out, pick it up, and gobble it down.  If you can resist temptation for just a little bit of time, you will likely reach a moment when you can think more rationally about what you’re doing.  Stall for time.

Before you touch the food, build in your mind a quick sketch of what is in it.  Is there likely to be a lot of sugar?  Fat?  Sodium?  Would it have more protein, or more carbs?  How much do you want to bet that it has scary-sounding preservatives in it?  Now (if they're available) look at the Nutrition Facts and see if your guesses were correct.  Look at the ingredients list.  Do you recognize ANYTHING in there?  Think about it as unemotionally as possible, because it’s emotions that are making you want that food.

If you’re still tempted, tell yourself that MAYBE you can have SOME of the food, but you have to wait 60 seconds.  Literally count the seconds in your head.  Or tell yourself you can have just a couple bites, but only after you do some other task.  Hopefully, you can stall long enough that you are making a more rational choice about whether to eat the food or not, and if so, how much.  Remember, eating only a couple bites of something bad instead of the whole thing is a better choice, though no bites at all is even better.

Beware of Tag-Alongs

I’m not talking about the peanut butter Girl Scout cookies (though you should beware of those too).  I’m talking about side dishes that you don’t need or want.  I may be about to rock your world here, but...burgers don’t actually HAVE to have fries on the side.  Sandwiches can be consumed without chips.  Ribs can be enjoyed without potato salad.  I discovered something about myself when I had this epiphany: I kinda don’t like french fries.  It had been so deeply ingrained in my mind that you have to have fries with your burger that I spent much of my life eating fries I didn’t even enjoy.

Do you absolutely have to have chips with your lunch, or are you eating them because you always have chips with your lunch?  Do you really want the beans at your company barbecue, or are you putting them on your plate because that’s what you do at a barbecue?  If you feel like you have to take them so you don't offend your boss who is irrationally proud of his baked bean recipe, put a little on your plate, say hi to the boss so he sees the beans, then take great pride that you're secretly going to throw them away.

Think really hard about the side dishes you eat, and don’t feel obligated to eat something you only kinda want.

Remove the Moments of Weakness

The human brain gets much more emotional and impulsive when it’s hungry.  There are two ways you can try to combat this unfortunate fact of psychology: don’t get hungry*, and make choices in advance.

Eat frequent meals.  If you have a good breakfast and a healthy snack at mid-morning and another in the afternoon, you will be less likely to desperately crave junk food for lunch and dinner.  Yes, they’re calories, but they’re good calories and they’re worth consuming.  Don’t let yourself get to the point where you’re staring into the fridge, ready to shove any old thing that doesn’t move into your mouth.  Not that I’VE ever done that, of course.

If you often eat lunch at a restaurant, find a healthy but enjoyable meal that can be your “usual”.  Then, when it’s time to order, always order that meal.  It will become habit, and soon you will be ordering that meal before you’ve even had a chance to think whether you want the grilled bacon-cheese-and-donut sandwich.  The employees may even start to remember your order, which is even better.

If you eat a lunch from home or eat at home every day, prep your meals on Sunday night and stack them in the fridge, ready to grab and go.  I grill chicken breasts and roast vegetables, then portion them into five reusable containers.  This meal is delicious warm or cold.

*There is a case to be made for fasting as a weight loss tool.  I would especially encourage you to look into "intermittent fasting" which involves not eating for a specific period of time, which is not the same thing as starving yourself.  It's not something I've ever tried, but I've read lots of evidence in its favor.

Mental Changes Lead to Physical Changes

You can change how you think about food, but you have to let it happen, and it takes effort.  You'll have to allow that change to happen, though.  Don't just decide you can't do it!  I'll have some more mind games for you to try in my next post, so stay tuned!

Best wishes,
The Friendly Lifter 

Also don't miss...

Mind Games 3 (exercise) 

Mind Games 4 (motivation) 

Mind Games 2: Trash Talk and More

Welcome back!  Here are more mind games you can play to trick yourself into eating healthier!

Also don't miss...

Mind Games 1 (more on diet)

Mind Games 3 (exercise) 

Mind Games 4 (motivation) 

Accentuate the Negative

Every time you eat something you shouldn’t and you have any kind of negative feeling, cling to that memory and recall it any time you’re confronted with that food in the future.  Ate a bunch of candy and didn’t really enjoy it?  Remember that.  Ate a large order of french fries and they sat in your stomach like lead?  Remember that!  Ate a muffin instead of a healthier breakfast and you were already hungry by 9:30 a.m.?  REMEMBER THAT!

Stop repeating history.  And whenever possible, have a healthier alternative food nearby that you can turn to when you have to fight temptation.  I keep a stack of protein bars (don't buy ones with lots of sugar) or a jar of peanut butter in my desk drawer at work.  (Yes, peanut butter!  A spoonful of straight up peanut butter can be very satisfying.  It even helps my sweet tooth, believe it or not.)  Protein bars and peanut butter can also make you fat if you eat them like a maniac, but they make good alternatives if eaten in reasonable portions.

Trash Talk

This is going to sound crazy.  But it totally works for me and I’ve heard from other people who also said it worked for them.  Trash-talk the junk food.  Not like, literally say rude things out loud, but inside your head, pretend that the junk food wants you to eat it.  Tell it you don’t need it.  Laugh in its face.  Call it stupid names.  Let your inner diva loose.  Walk right by and flip it off.  Treat it like you wish you could treat your boss or your ex.  Exercise all the cruelty in your soul.

For example: “Psssh, donut?  No, I don’t think so.  The last time I ate a donut I was sleepy for the rest of the day, and I didn’t even LIKE it that much.  Damn thing was stale!  You can just stay in that box and beg for someone else to eat you, because there’s no way I’m touching you.  Yeah, that’s right, cry, stupid donut, because you’re pathetic.”

You might be surprised just how emotionally satisfying this can be.  Plus, by the time you’ve gotten through your sassy little speech, you’ve hopefully stalled through the moment of danger and you can think more rationally about why you don’t need that food.

Don’t Trash Talk Yourself, Though

Well...some people actually tell me this works for them, hating themselves every time they fall off the wagon and calling themselves “Fatty” every time they look in the mirror.  But I think most people are more likely to give up altogether once they start with the negative self-talk.  It’s just too easy to go from “I’m bad because I failed” to “I’m bad, so why bother?”.  Don’t go there.

Don’t wallow in guilt if you cheat and eat something you know you shouldn’t, but do resolve to get back on the horse.  Sugar tends to be addictive, so your body will crave it after you’ve had some.  Be prepared for that: keep the healthy alternatives in easy reach and redouble your efforts to take the emotional feelings out of your food choices.  If you can, throw away the tempting foods while you’re still determined.

See Yourself as a Healthy Eater

Don’t try to eat healthy.  Be a Healthy Eater.   Be the kind of person who is okay with a banana for dessert.  Be the kind of person who preps their lunches in advance, so you don’t have to worry about what you’re eating.  Be the kind of person who makes special requests at the restaurant.  You might think it’s impossible, but you’re trying to change yourself physically, and that’s going to take at least a little bit of mental change too.

Think you’ve been an unhealthy eater for too long to change how you see yourself?  Screw that, you don’t have to be chained to who you used to be.

Think other people will scoff at your turnaround?  Yep, probably.  Screw them, they don’t own you.  If they sneer, remember that’s usually the sign of a person who knows they should be doing better themselves, and their guilt causes them to take pot shots.

Think last night’s binge means you lose your Healthy Eater credential?  Screw that!  Don’t wallow, don’t send yourself hate mail, just resolve to settle for a small treat next time, and go grill some chicken breasts.

But...the Food at the Office...

Yes, I know it's free.  If that fact hypnotizes you into picking up something you shouldn't eat, wake up before it goes in your mouth, sneak over to the trash can, and throw it away.  Just because it's free doesn't mean you have to eat it.

Surprise Yourself

You might be surprised that you can make this work, but I won’t be.  I know you can do this nutrition thing.  It might take work, but you’re worth the effort.  Now go out there and talk yourself into being a Healthy Eater!

Best wishes,
The Friendly Lifter


P.S. - If you have a Costco store in your area, I'd like to recommend their Kirkland (store brand) protein bars.  They are pretty yummy and have a much better protein-to-sugar ratio than any other bar I've found.  Costco also has great deals on protein powder--I swear, my savings on protein powder alone pay for my annual membership.

Mind Games 3: At the Gym

No, Seriously, This Stuff Worked for Me, Too...

Previously, on The Friendly Lifter:

I talked about all kinds of mind games that I play when I’m trying to eat more healthily.  Here are some more mind games that helped me get more fit; these are about exercising when you might not want to.  Remember that this is about doing something for your health and happiness, and you’re worth it.

Celebrate the Small Victories

The human brain has a sadly limited amount of patience.  Waiting around to see results on the scale or around our belt line takes too long for our impatient brains, and it doesn’t take long before we start to wonder why we even bother trying.  You need to find victories in the short term.  The sooner, the better.

What really made the biggest difference for me was learning to celebrate even the tiniest victory in my workouts as if they were a big deal.  Because every single victory IS A BIG FRIGGIN’ DEAL!  When you exercise, focus really, really hard on any moment that represents success or feels good.  Did you lift that weight one more time than you did last week?  Have a little party in your head!  Did you feel proud of yourself for getting out of the house and walking when you wanted to lie down on the couch?  Let that be a little imaginary trophy to go on your mental mantelpiece.  Did it feel good to stretch your muscles and feel them working?  Hold on to that feeling, because you're going to love it next time too!

Nothing is too small to celebrate, but sometimes you have to look carefully to find those things.  All those tiny little victories will pile up, and eventually, you are going to see a big victory in the mirror and on the scale.

And whatever you do, don’t let yourself dwell on setbacks.  There will be days when you’re extra tired, or you’re grumpy, or things just don’t work the way you want them to.   That’s a bump in the road, and we all have those.  Get over the bump and keep going.  You can even turn a bad day into a victory if you look at it the right way--sure your workout wasn’t great today, but you could have stayed home, and half a workout’s better than none.  Relax and get back at it tomorrow. 

Just Five Minutes

There is a side of me that is essentially a giant toddler, and he hates being forced to do anything he doesn’t wanna.  Mostly I love to exercise, but there are days when my toddler side comes out.  So just as I did when my son was little, I pretend the toddler might get his way, but we’ll see.  When it’s time to go to the gym for some cycling or treadmill and my whiny self is starting to cry, I tell myself I’ll just walk through the door and if I still don’t feel I can handle it when I get there, I’ll give myself permission to turn around and leave.

But once I’m there I think about how embarrassing it would be to just turn around and walk back out.  And I did come all this way, so I might as well get on the treadmill.  I tell my toddler self I’ll just do one minute, and then if I’m too tired, we can go home.  After one minute, I realize how silly I will look getting back off and I ask my toddler self if he really wants all these people to see me giving up after only one minute.  I can usually convince him that five minutes will look better; that’s just four more.  Once those five minutes are up, if I’m not completely exhausted, I typically play the Five More Minutes Game until I realize I’ve finished the entire workout.  Often, at some point during the session, the toddler in me realizes that this actually doesn’t suck that much, and I can get him to shut up.

Find Inspiration Rather Than Motivation

I often hear people talk about needing motivation to work out.  But I’ve observed that usually, we average folks look to pictures of super-fit or hyper-muscular people for motivation.  Those ultra-godlike celebrity people have absolutely worked their butts off for years, but remember that they probably also have huge genetic advantages and likely augment those advantages in ways average folks never could, due to expense, lack of access, or health concerns.  Sure it would be great to look like those people, but when you’ve been working out and logging every calorie for 6 months and still don’t look like them, motivation can turn to discouragement.

Instead, try finding inspiration.  Rather than idolizing the uber-athletic (as hard-working as they are), focus on the extra-tenacious.  Think about the person who overcomes adversity, who keeps going even when the crap gets crappier.  Maybe you can’t be 300 pounds of solid muscle, or a size negative 2, but you can be tough and tenacious, and you can do it right now.

Surely you can think of someone to inspire you.  It could be a celebrity who fought cancer and won, or a sports hero who came back from a terrifying injury.  It could be a relative or friend who goes for a jog even when the weather sucks.  It could be a book or movie character who refuses to be defeated by overwhelming odds.  It could be your dog, who is cheerful even when her leg is bandaged and she’s got that stupid cone on.

In my humble opinion, it’s far more practical and effective to strive for that kind of greatness.  Look what your inspirational person overcame.  If they did amazing things, you can do amazing things.  Even if it’s getting on that treadmill when you’ve had a long, crappy day.  I'm serious, that counts as amazing in my book!

Drop the Guilt

I know this is going to be very difficult for some of you.  I hear many people, women and men, say that they feel guilty for the time they take to go jogging or lift weights or do yoga because they feel like they should be spending it with their family.  And I do know it can make you feel like the worst Disney villain ever when you drop your sobbing kid off at the gym’s child care room.  But don’t forget that you are partly doing this because your family deserves a healthy, happy spouse and parent.  Plus, a good workout can help to clear your head and bring perspective to family problems that feel overwhelming and overly-charged with emotion.  Once you’re done, you’ll take a deep breath and maybe not be so upset over that broken jar of strawberry jelly this morning.

I know it’s hard to drop the guilt.  But you deserve this workout, and your family needs you to have it too.

Go on! Get in there!

The Friendly Lifter 

Also, don't miss...

Mind Games 2 (more on diet)

Mind Games 4 (motivation)